RECAP 41: Capital Vices

RECAP 41: Capital Vices


RECAP 41: Capital Vices

You know that song, My Own Worst Enemy?

Well, this game was kinda like that, but instead of having fun, getting drunk and lacing a rant with obscene, it was absolutely nothing like that song.

But the Penguins were their own worst enemy last night.

Take nothing away from the phenomenally good performance Mike Condon turned in.  This falls directly on the penalty trouble the birds have gotten themselves into lately.  This falls on the neutral zone turnovers leading to odd-man rushes.

This falls simply on poor decision making.  Each goal against, you can point to some mental error being the root cause: a poorly taken penalty, a poor clearance, a blown coverage, or a bad pass.

But take it all with a grain of salt, because if the last year has taught us anything, it’s these sort of games are an anomaly from this team under this coach.


Despite Guy Boucher trying to get that bullshit 1-3-1 that he implements with his teams that suck dick at ice hockey, you just cannot slow down a Pens/Sens game.  From the onset, it had the feel of being another track meet between  Kuhnhackl, back in the lineup after missing 9 games, ringing one off the pipe on the Pens first attempt at goal and Chris Kelly almost scoring on a spinning backhander, you just knew goals would come.

And they did.

Early on, Hagelin mimicked TJ Broshie and two handed Mark Stone to give the Sens the first PP of the night.  They nearly killed it off, but nearly isn’t nearly enough when you don’t clear the puck like grown adults, then chase your fuck up also like un-grown adults.  Robert Ryan from Ovi Street.  1-0 Sens

A minute or so later, the Pens would hop on their first powerplay after the Sens got caught with too many men.  Could’ve easily been 2-0 had it not been for Mom’s Spaghetti.

Small sample size, but a trend was established for that short period:  A minute later, the Pens would go down a man again with Oleksy heading off for hooking Turris.  Seven seconds is all it took as Hoffman would double the Sens lead with a Crosby-like impossible deflection that could literally be considered a war crime.  Light treason, at least.  2-0

With 3:17 left, Kuhnhackl would literally tackle Ryan Dzingel in the offensive zone.  But because of the Law of Averages, which is the principle that supposes that if you keep taking dipshit penalties, you’ll eventually kill one off, they finally did that.


Much like the Pens first PP of the game, when they got their second midway through the period, it was the Senators getting the better of the chances during the 2 minute spell.  Again, it was JG Pageau and Zack Smith combining to do the most damage, but Smith was denied by the post on their 2v1 chance.

As the period wore on, the Penguins started finding their legs a little bit more, forcing Condon to make more saves than Trojan.

But right as the Pens looked like they were taking the game over, one of the shitty Pyatt brothers tipped a Karlsson shot to increase the lead after a lost D-zone faceoff and blown coverage.  No way should Pyatt be alone in front there.   3-0

The Pens were able to continue getting some chances, but as was the case for most of the game, they wouldn’t capitalize on them, including a Scott Wilson breakaway that hit the crossbar and a 3rd PP opportunity that went by the wayside.

That is until about 6 seconds left in the period.  Cole made a really great play to hold the puck in at the point and get it to 71 to wire a shot for Sheary to deflect through a hole in Condon.  3-1



Coming into this game, the Sens lost just once when leading after 2 periods, good for a 12-1-0 record.  The late 2nd period goal had given the Pens some new life and had it not been for Condon’s protection, their lead would have been nothing more than a load dumped into a reservoir tip.

Basically this.

And with about 11 minutes left, the Pens 90 consecutive games of without consecutive regulation losses would die.

Never forget.

Whatever the fuck happened, there was a total miscue where a lead pass went to a Pittsburgh player going to the bench.  They scrambled with their dicks in their hands to not get caught with too many men and it cost them as the Sens turned it up ice and made them pay for running around.  4-1

Sens got another PP at the end of the game, which led to Sullivan getting tossed for something.

Goddamn love it.  Love that the Penguins have a coach that has a damn pulse.



  • Scott Wilson was noticeable in a good way.  His speed was evident and he was using it a lot to create.  Probably could’ve had 2 goals and his play was rewarded in the second half of the game by riding shotty with Malkin.
  • Steve Oleksy was noticeable in a bad way.  He was really serviceable for a couple of games, but in the last two, he was nothing short of a liability.
  • Great game out of Condon, making 29 saves on the night, including 13 in the 2nd period.
  • Pens got handled on the possession side of things at 5v5 too, until the third period when score effects took over.

Pens head to Detroit Saturday night with a losing streak on their hands.  Go Pens.

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