“This is exactly why we never should have traded for him,” Richmond Hill resident Isaac Day said of Phil Kessel. Day is a lifelong Toronto Maple Leafs fan, who blames Kessel for single handedly derailing the Maple Leafs during his tenure with the team.
“This guy Yo… Yohee? Yohay?” Day said, pointing to the name of writer Josh Yohe, on an article he had printed off from The Athletic, for some reason. “This guy gets it.”
“Check this line out right here,” Day continued, before scanning the article he had been waving in front of the writer, “He’s a ‘pain in the ass’. They said it right here, and you can’t put it in the Athletics if it’s not true. They make you pay a subscription for the Athletics, so you know it’s legit”
Day then frantically looked through the rest of the article for more proof his personal vendetta had merit. “Aha! Here we go: ‘Multiple people in the Penguins organization believe Kessel was “pouty”‘ Haha! I [explative] knew it!” Day exclaimed, ignoring a line a paragraph later that asserted that Kessel was not a problem in the locker room.
“Ooh yeah, this is choice too. ‘I don’t think Sullivan’ — that’s Pittsburgh’s coach, right? — ‘likes Kessel very much.’ Haha, God, Kessel is such a chud,” Day concluded, shaking his head with a smile on his face, presumably because he felt vindication for his feelings towards the Penguins forward.
As of press time, Phil Kessel has played a vital role in winning the Stanley Cup twice with the Pittsburgh Penguins.