(Jamie Benn laughs at Minnesota’s pain)
Can we please just end the season now? I love hockey, really, I do, but the Wild this season have really tested my resolve. Now that they are out of the playoffs officially, I almost want the team to call off the rest of the season.
Consider, at the beginning of the year, the Wild were the story of the season, on top of the league. Since January, they have been thoroughly and painfully incompetent, as much do to injury as an overall lack of talent. I think they have earned maybe 6 points in the last 3 months or so. I would look it up, but I fear the overwhelming wave of depression that would surely follow.
Other bad teams are still watchable for their fans. Aside from the particular brand of hockey the Wild are playing, namely that they don’t score any goals, and really don’t allow THAT many mean the games aren’t that exciting. They have a good goalie and a better than bad blue line and absolutely no healthy forwards. They don’t score, and their opponents don’t score. It’s excruciating hockey, even if you aren’t committed to the team. Objectively and subjectively, the Wild are hard to watch.
If you look at other teams that are falling apart here late in the season, they get to scout the youngsters that now get roster spots because pricey veterans have been traded away. They get to see a little hope for next season at the end of this miserable season. Well, Minnesota has called up more players than any other team, by a substantial margin, and the team has sucked because of it.
So there is no hope at the end of the season, and the team plays a cripplingly boring game that drafs their opponents down with them. Besides, it’s been really awesome this spring, and I want to go outside. Don’t make me endure this any more. Please.