I wrote last week that I stopped blogging full-time about the Bills because I just found myself writing the same sort of diatribe in regards to our football team. There are only so many swear words I can find in my vocabulary. However, I’m really fired up. While none of this is breaking news at this site, the message should be sent even if its the same message. Hey, if the Bills can roll out the same garbage on the field, I can bring out the same old declaration.
Burn this organization to the ground.
Fire everyone.
Have the future Sentinels in “X-MEN Days of Future Past” come in and destroy everyone who has the Ralph Wilson gene in them. What is the Ralph Wilson gene you ask? It means you were somehow hired by Ralph or his flunkies.
Everyone needs to go. Fuck the continuity argument. That crap is PR 101 from the Bills and was brought to us by the same idiots who somehow survived the last 17 years. If we followed the continuity argument, does that mean Dick Jauron should still be here because he has the most wins of any of the coaches since 2001? Should Trent Edwards still be the QB? Fuck you if you really think continuity is the key.
Here’s a continuity take that I’ve had since 2000: Don’t hire fucking idiots to run this team.
Rex Ryan
My “love” for the hiring of Rex Ryan was simple: They hired the biggest fish in the pond. It was cool to finally be the team who hired the guy no one seemed to think we’d get outside of Buffalo. Maybe it was a combination of being in love with the Pegulas money or the fact we knew the team wasn’t moving, but I was fooled. It must have been a really bad year for coaching candidates if this numskull was the lead guy.
Rex conned Bills fans because he did something a number of them have always wanted: Telling them how great they are and how great the team was going to be.Remember that playoff decree at his opening conference? That’s what fans wanted to hear and once they realized he was a fraud, it was over. What did Rex do wrong? He destroyed a top notch defense because he believed his way was the only way to win.
Under Rex, the Bills are 4-12 against teams with an above .500 record. They have allowed 30 or more points in 11 of their 29 games. Under Pettine/Schwartz, that number was 5 games. When they are playing the Case Keenum’s or Briskett’s (Brissett, but Joe’s on a roll – Rich) of the world, the defense is decent, but when they play against offenses that are above average, they have been below average. When the Bills have played a top 10 offense under Ryan, they are 1-9 with their only win against NE and their 3rd string QB. I can’t wait for Rex to spin this after he gets fired. The Bills did everything for him. They gave Rex his crappy twin brother who is more Devito than Arnold. He had all his Jets rejects come to his team. He was allowed to bring in who he wanted personnel wise. He was given way more power than he deserved.
You want to talk about Tyrod making 27-million if the Bills pick up his option as a waste? How about the 27-million they gave to this idiot to be an average coach who happens to be in terrible Tops commercials.
Doug Whaley
I remember being thrilled when the Bills hired Whaley in 2010. It was what I wanted because he was an outside voice in an organization that had way too many lifers (More on that later). He came from a winning organization and was brought in to basically be the heir apparent Buddy Nix. And that’s where the rub lies….How much was Whaley involved with his mentor and even today?
There are so many inner circle stories with the Bills that its basically the plots of Interstellar meets Inception. In other words, I don’t know WTF to think.
Was he responsible for EJ Manuel or did he go to the bathroom during the selection? Was he responsible for the Bills having the 2nd most losses between 2010-2012 or was he begging the Bills to select Gronk/Russel Wilson? Was he for OBJ and Derek Carr or did a certain snakeoil salesman whisper in his ear to trade for Sammy for tickets sake? Was he even allowed to ask Rex Ryan a question in his interview or did he and Rex pick matching swimsuits when they were treating Pegula’s yacht like the Love Boat? Did he want Tyrod here or did Rex tell him he wanted Tyrod here?
We can go tit for tat when it comes to Whaley’s good or bad moves, but my problem is trying to figure out how much of them are his moves. Plus, since he was hired in 2010, the Bills have the 8th most losses in the NFL. That in itself should be grounds for firing.
Remember the movie Outbreak when Donald Sutherland wanted to blow up the town that had the African monkey virus? Innocent people were going to die, but they couldn’t risk having someone get out of the town with that disease and spreading it to others. That’s where I am at with Whaley. He may not have the virus, but why the hell risk it if we aren’t sure? Clean. Fucking. Sweep.
Russ “Littlefinger” Brandon
If you don’t watch Game of Thrones (You are a fucking dweeb, if you don’t), let me give you the synopsis of one “Peter “Littlefinger” Baelish. Basically he befriends everyone and pretends to be your best friend. He wants to rule the world and will use everyone around him to do his dirty work. He’s fucked over Catherine Stark, Ned Stark, the Tullys, his wife, Sansa Stark, the Baratheons, and Cersei. He’s NOT to be trusted because he always finds a way to save his own ass by hiding behind the person he manipulates to do things he wants. And by the time that puppet falls on his sword, Littlefinger finds someone else to befriend.
That’s Russ Brandon.
I find it kind of ironic (Did I use that right?) that once Tim Graham wrote about the issues with Russ, everyone started getting on the “ITS HIM!! IT WAS ALWAYS HIM” train. Fuckers, I’VE BEEN SAYING THIS SINCE 2010!!
Let’s look at the circumstantial evidence for the 20th time by me:
1) He was named GM for 2 seasons and somehow it has now been twisted that he was just a figurehead during those two seasons. Really? Who was the person who came out to introduce Terrell Owens when he was the GM? It wasn’t Dick Jauron. It was Russ. Also, there was a media ass kissing narrative around 2008 when the Bills started 4-0… “He’s aggressive with how he traded for Marcus Stroud and Kawika Mitchell.” This happened. Then, once the shit really hit the fan in 2009, well, Russ became the figurehead and it was all Modrak. Again, manipulates people to do his dirty work and when someone has to fall, he’s just the guy marketing Fred Jackson. (Note this is also the language used in the Watkins trade after the fact. Hmm. – Rich)
2) He brought us “The Dougs” which was about as dysfunctional as you can get. Remember his “Passing the baton” press conference when Ralph was basically dead in Detroit? We were going to be “forward thinking” and all those idiotic Brandonisms he throws around. How did that turn out? Russ should have been fired based on the way the GM/Coach got along during those two years and its implosion. Seriously, he “finally” gets a crack at the big chair and he brings us two guys who hated working with each other. Good fucking job.
3) I had a DM from a Bills media person who told me that after the Watkins trade went down, Russ Brandon said Watkins was the best player in the league. Yes, you read that correctly. BEST. PLAYER. IN. THE. LEAGUE without playing a down. I will always believe that Russ manipulated Doug Whaley to make the Watkins deal. He wanted to save his ass and win now and used Ralph Wilson’s death as a way to be the true rogue of this organization.
4) Graham had this in his piece about what had gone down with the hiring of Rex and how Russfinger is involved with weekly meetings with the coach, GM, and owner. Um, should “The marketing guy” be involved in this? Again, I DON’T WANT THIS ASSHOLE NEAR MY FOOTBALL OPERATIONS DEPARTMENT. Hue Jackson said he thought he was getting the Bills job (Note: Bet DW wanted him), yet, Russ was giving Rex tips on how to schmooze Terry? hmmmm. Sounds like Russ was thinking about having Rex in all those terrible commercials and being on a cutout at M&T Bank. I wonder if Russ probably told Hue to wear a Pat LaFontaine #16 pin to his interview?
Bottom line: He has a say in football operations because he’s in the meetings. I don’t think he’s sitting there and drawing Rex Ryan’s face on a t-shirt to sell to the Blvd Mall. I hate to say it, but the Pegulas still don’t know how to run the football team. So, they listen to the closest idiots in that building for incite and Russ perfect for being a sounding board.
And lastly, Stop telling me this asshole is a marketing genius. Holy shit. I’m sorry, but Russ Brandon has nothing to do with me going to like 20+ Bills games since 2000. Please, season ticket holders, tell me what did Russ Brandon do to make you go to games? Was it the shitty Toronto experiment? Did he have a “bring your daughter to Bills games” day? Did they give out Jim Kelly bobblehead dolls? He did NOTHING. I
People go to Bills games because the NFL happens to be the most popular sport in the country. People go to Bills games because its the cheapest NFL ticket and fans love getting wasted in the parking lot. People go to Bills games because it is a connection to the big time of being relevant in America. People go to Bills games because of the 90s Bills nostalgia act.
What did Russ have to do with those marketing plans I just laid out?
Was it that hard to figure out? Aren’t the Bills like last in revenue in the NFL? How the hell can you say he’s a marketing genius when they are last at making money? I’d like to see Brandon’s marketing plan if the Bills decide to get a new stadium and start charging legit NFL ticket prices. I’d like to see how he’d do when it came to getting fortune 500 companies to buy luxury boxes to that new stadium. Call me when he has to do that before we start throwing around the word “Marketing genius”. Brandon’s claim to fame is he buttered up a bunch of rich old guys. That’s not genius, its called being serendipitous.
Final word:
Fuck you. Blow this thing up. If you cut off just part of the snake’s tail, it will grow back. That’s what has happened since 2005. They fired Donahoe, but they kept John Guy and Tom Modrak on for 4 and 6 more years!. They hired Buddy Nix, but kept Modrak on for two draft classes. Buddy Nix retired after having the 2nd worst W/L record over his 3 years as GM and promoted his protege. Ralph Wilson “Retired” and then had his asshole protege run the team who promised us a robust analytics team that was basically a subscription to PFF and Jeremy White’s password for All-22.
I started with a Cersei/Tyrion exchange and I’ll end it with Tyrion’s response to Cersei:
“Every time they deal with an enemy, we create two more.”
That’s exactly why they need to burn it down. Firing Rex won’t stop the enemies from coming in. And, I, for one, vote for Cersei’s season 6 finale plan of using wildfire to One Bills Drive. Burn them all.
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