In the midst of another baffling downturn of offensive production, Busch Stadium was over-run with moths on Friday night. Friends, sometimes the columns just write themselves. Let’s go to eHow and see how a building goes about getting a moth infestation:
1) Cracks.
According to Matt Buffaloe of the University of Washington, moths like living in cracks. Therefore, if a houseis crack-ridden (on the walls especially), and the owner is struggling with a moth problem, he would have a pretty good idea where the problem could be coming from.
Or as Cardinal fans would more commonly call them – Peter Bourjos’ and Jhonny Peralta’s batting averages! The Cardinals rank 27th out of 30 teams in the only stat that actually matters in baseball – runs scored. Some would also consider that a pretty big crack.
2) Light.
On a short term basis, lighting is another factor that affects moths greatly. A house that is not well lit, and especially if it also happens to have cracks on the walls, shouldn’t surprise the owner too much when it turns out that the light conditions of the house are the main reasons behind its moth infestation.
Oh, like having the best pitching in baseball, a stacked line-up and the deepest minor-league roster of MLB ready talent and still not being able to guide a team to anything but around a .500 record? That light?
I’m starting to think that there really might be something to this…
3) Buying Infested Products.
Sometimes, moths gain entry into a house not because of any particular factors native to the house in question, but rather through products that are already infested; for instance, fabrics or foodstuffs that are bought.
107,502,360 – that’s the Cardinals payroll in 2014. As of Saturday they have exactly 2 players that have a WAR (wins above replacement level player) of 1.0 – Matt Carpenter and Yadier Molina. The Houston Astros have 3 (2 above 2.0). Their payroll? 44,474,300.
You get it.
And now you’re not surprised that Busch is moth central. The Cardinals are 5.5 games back in the NL Central. They’ve lost 3 games in a row, including 2 to the Phillies who were 6 games under .500 when they arrived in St. Louis. And in those 3 losses have scored 4 runs total.
Months, man. They haven’t been around for a while, but the last time they came, it was a harbinger of good fortune to come. Let’s hope it is once again in 2014.
#RallyMoth
Photo: YouTube
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