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Asshat claims Bruins circumvented cap with Seguin’s Dunkin’ Donuts deal

Tyler Seguin Dunkin Donuts

Normally we don’t even take on this grade of stupid but we’re on our lunch break and we haven’t hated on anyone in a while.

Today is that day.

Kevin Baumer, asshat extraordinaire for BusinessInsider.com, had a short post this morning claiming the Boston Bruins circumvented the salary cap with Tyler Seguin by having Dunkin Donuts pick him up as their new spokesperson.

Here’s what he wrote:

Tyler Seguin, the second overall pick of the 2010 NHL Draft has signed an endorsement deal with Dunkin’ Donuts — a company that just happens to be one of his team’s biggest sponsors.

The Bruins have significant salary cap issues this season, leading some to speculate that teams are using these deals with trusted corporate partners to funnel extra money to players “under the table.”

Matthew Coller of BizofHockey.com has also jumped on the short bus this morning. And all because some dude Terry Frei was told to see “how long it took NHL executives to figure out new ways how to not necessarily circumvent or violate the cap, but to at least find imaginative ways to ‘massage’ it.”

Be careful, Baumer is behind the wheel…

Two things:

1) Seguin’s making the rookie max in the league. The Bruins can’t pay him any more by NHL rules. So right there it’s not cap circumvention.

In fact, here’s the rule from NHL-FUCKING-DOT-COM (stress ours):

How much can Entry Level players make?

Entry Level players will be subject to a maximum annual salary (plus signing and games played bonuses) of $850,000 for 2005 and 2006 draftees; $875,000 for 2007 and 2008 draftees; $900,000 for 2009 and 2010; and $925,000 for 2011 draftees.

Seguin’s making $900K. He’s capped out.

2) The Bruins are still in cap trouble. If the Dunkin Donuts deal was to help the Bruins cap issues… ugh… well… it failed. They’re still in trouble when Sturmface and Savard come back. #NHLCapCircumventionFail

3) How is being signed by a sponsor cap circumvention? To think that a team is persuasive enough to get another company to drop bombshells of cash on a player is a bit of a stretch of the imagination, although not entirely out of the realm of possibility.

But it’s not like Bruins fans came out in mass swarms to see Seguin play at the Boston Garden during rookie games this fall or are buying his t-shirts by the truckload… Oh wait… they are…

Really. This is just some lazy reporter trying to stir up some trouble and get easy hits for his website. We’ve provided the link so you can read what shithead wrote, but don’t. Don’t give him the benefit of the hits; plus, we “excerpted” his entire post in those two graphs anyways. A little more “digging” and he would’ve noticed the Bruins have maxed out what they can give the rookie.

If Baumer and Co. wants to start a Cap Circumvention Witch Hunt, they’ll have to start in another city.