RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

 

For a while the Bruins were struggling to score goals. And then the Flyers and Islanders happened. Flyers had turned it on since they got Mason but the Bruins reminded them how awful Philly's team really is. They're lucky they're in the Metro division where everyone but the Pens suck, and the Pens are fielding an AHL squad. The Islanders, however, were giving the Bruins fits this season. The addition of Vanek definitely was part of it, but Boston's always been good at shooting their own feet against subpar NHL teams.

But the past couple of games Boston has been the team they should be against the Isles and Flyers. It's like the Bruins are that bully that used to shove you in your locker in middle school. You want to kick his ass but you know he's just going to have his way with you (PHRASING). 

That's what the Bruins have essentially done the past few games. They've taken the Islanders and the Flyers and jammed them back into a locker in the NHL basement.

It's hard to be mad at them for their semi-slump the past few weeks. The Bruins younger D-Men are performing admirably, but they're not Dennis Seidenberg. Hopefully what has happened since Seids went down gives B's fans a greater perspective of just how good he is.

Also, we hope Vanek signs in the West in the off season. Dude is a regular season Bruins killer.

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

– Brad Marchand. He is such a frustrating player in the sense that to be at his best, he has to walk that line that causes him to take dumb ass penalties that make you want to throw stuff at your TV. But with that swagger comes points, and Marchand has been raining down pucks on goalies like him and Seguin used to rain down dollar bills on strippers. 

What seems to frustrate teams even more with Marchand is that not only is he an annoying, antagonizing rat, but then he can go ahead and score on you in different ways as well. The Bruins didn't like Marchand's lil fake ring kiss and Cup raise a few weeks ago, but Marchand needs that kind of cockiness in his game. Sure it comes with some annoying side effects, but the benefits GREATLY out weight the negatives.

– Congrats to Big Z on his 500th career point. Boston's incredibly awesome Captain has been an absolute beast for this team and we're glad that he's not only our favorite team's captain, but that we got to see him reach this milestone with a Spoked B on his chest. The Bruins are lucky to have him.

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

– Watching Patrice Bergeron is amazing. AMAZING. All the little things he does away from the puck, he way you can literally see him calculating potential plays while he's skating, thinking steps ahead of his opponents. Screw you Triple H, Patrice Bergeron is the Cerebral Assassin.

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

– Great to see Loui get on the board. It's been such a rough season for him in Boston but he continues to persevere. He also seems to be doing a better job keeping his head up which is great for multiple reasons.

– Gregory Campbell didn't get in a fight. He REALLY needs to stop fighting. Like we've said, we love the effort and the balls but he never wins and his head is essentially used as a speed bag. That's not good for his career or his long term health. 

– Soderberg's goal. Jebus. Kid's got skills. You could tell how bad he wanted that goal. That sweet Swede was HUNGRY. Seriously, look how he uses his body to make sure no one else can touch the puck. You work that body Carl.

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

– Hello, My name is Reilly Smith and I make goal scoring look easy.

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

– Apparently Kevan Miller was offended that someone dared breath near him, and tried to stop that.

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

– You mad bro? You even lift bro?!

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

– Danny Paille. ALWAYS Danny Paille.

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

– This defensive play looked like the DOY crew trying to play NHL 14. Awful.

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

– I'm mad at you Okposo. I draft you in fantasy three years in a row and you disappoint me. So this year I give you the fantasy finger (PHRASING) and now you're a beast. Also, you were mean to Chad Johnson.

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

– Classic Clutterbuck. Wait until opponent starts to turn around, trip them, run, wait for ref to hold player back, then act tough. Chara has more talent in his first shit of the day than Clutterbuck has in his whole body.

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

– Defense? What's that?

– Guy like Tavares being stuck on a joke of a team like the Islanders. 

– So cute that Poulin thinks he is an NHL level goalie.

– Awful scouting that the Islanders brass thinks Poulin is an NHL level goalie.

– Charles Wang. Him and Jeremy Jacobs have a lot in common.

RECAP: Bruins Put Up 6, Chara Gets #500. BRUINS WIN!

– Time for Bruins to look outside the organization for some defensive help?

– Can we just build a statue of Patrice Bergeron now?

– Have I told you lately that I…want you to shut up?

Arrow to top