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The Sports Daily > Hall of Very Good
Taking on the Critics of Rookie of the Year

What follows are six reviews from six different people who had the testicular fortitude to criticize “Rookie of the Year”, starring our new BFF Thomas Ian Nicholas.

I have decided that all six of these people need a talking to.  So, below is me responding to the criticisms of the people I have deemed “The Silly Six”.

It needs to be pointed out that this movie was made for kids, during a time when Special Effects were about to take a huge leap forward.  They did the best they could, with what they had.  Some of these people watched this movie expecting it to be “Citizen Kane”…or “The Natural”.

But it isn’t. And I think it needs my help.

The Amazon reviews will be notated, since they will be screen shots.  My comments are the things not pulled from Amazon.

How can you know it was dumb if you only watched 15 minutes?  Every movie is dumb if you only watch 15 minutes!  If you only watch 15 minutes of any Quentin Tarantino movie, you are going to think he is some kind of weird bloodlust pervert (which he may be, but that is a conversation for another day).  And it’s only “money wasted” because you only watched 15 minutes!!!  You don’t even know about the “Float it” scene, or what happens to Chet Steadman.

Any dumb-dumb with a computer can complain about something they haven’t fully seen.  Watch the movie, in its entirety, and then we can have a rational conversation with the people at Amazon about getting you your money back.

Maybe your brain is what aged like wine.  Perhaps the part of your brain that registers entertainment has been ruined by Michael Bay and Pokemon Go.  Of course this movie didn’t age very well, because you didn’t age very well.  Movies only age as well as you built them up as a kid, so maybe you had crappy taste in film when you were a kid.  Why is that Daniel Stern’s fault?

And a “Night Train” reference!?!?!?  Have you spent your life riding the rails and carrying a nap sack over your shoulder?  I don’t know that they even sell that combination of Kool-Aid and unleaded gasoline any more.  Take some responsibility for your own choice in watching this movie…this was an avoidable tragedy.  And if you find some Night Train…take a picture.

Have you ever considered that maybe you shouldn’t review a movie based on the physical quality of the DVD you purchased?  I am glad Target had another copy, but you probably could have returned your scratched one to Amazon.  Don’t leave reviews about a movie, if your issue is with Amazon.  Sounds like you left this review in vain because you couldn’t wait to get a new copy, so you ran to Target…that means you love “Rookie of the Year”!!

So why would you sully it’s good name on account of Amazon sending you a bum copy of the DVD?

First of all, you were clearly expecting an expose on the inner working of American Baseball clubhouses.  You also must not have read the description of this movie: “When the cast comes off his once broken arm, a 12-year-old boy can throw a 100-mile-an-hour speedball, and the Chicago Cubs want him as their new pitcher!”  Based on that description, I can see how you were misled (is what I would say if that title did not prepare you for the insanely silly children’s movie you ended up paying for).  And when you saw that Gary Busey was the biggest name in the movie, you must have assumed that this would be filled with Oscar-worthy acting performance…an honest mistake to make.

It sounds like you bought this expecting it to be “Moneyball”…when everything about it should have told you that you were in for a movie that only a 13-year-old could truly appreciate.  For the record, Muhammad Ali absolutely could have punched someone out of a door and down a flight of stairs, the fact that you would even insinuate that he couldn’t, is ludicrous.  I am 5’10” and weigh 180 pounds, and in his prime, Ali could have knocked me through a concrete wall if he wanted to.  Don’t drag a real athlete into your hang-ups about a movie clearly designed for kids, that you thought would be filled with blow and strippers in the clubhouse.

Maybe before you review a movie, you should check yourself…before you, proverbially, wreck yourself.  And stay away from “The Secret Life of Pets”, because it is animated and not a documentary.

Your complaint is the only one that has some merit.  In fact, I kind of agree with you.  The baseball scenes are shot like the director was afraid to show any actual baseball being played.  So you are free from my scorn this time.  Your critiques are valid and show that you knew you were getting into a kids movie, but still wanted to some baseball in your baseball movie.

Please continue reviewing on Amazon, your logic is sound.

This review is 10 years old and I imagine your house is littered with “door stop” movies.  If you think this should be thrown out of movie history, you should really take a closer look at movie history.  I can name you at least 15 worse sports movies than this one, that doesn’t even include regular movies.

In fact, I have seen “Rookie of the Year” in the 2016 calendar year and can name three movies that were worse: “Batman v. Superman”, “The Do-Over” and “Gods of Egypt” (don’t judge…I was on a plane).  Of course the acting was terrible, it was anchored by a 13-year-old and Gary Busey.  Not to mention that nowhere in any description of this movie do you see the phrase, “in their award-winning role”.  Negative 10 stars is not an actual review, so be more constructive with your feedback.

And you are not Luke Skywalker, because he is pretend and half of his movie cannon is worse than “Rookie of the Year” (See Episodes 1-3).

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Lou Olsen is The Hall of Very Good’s resident Chief of ‘Stache and is also the co-host of the wildly popular HOVG Podcast.  You can follow him on Twitter at @louciferolsen.

Joe Grabinski is the creator of the wildly popular Twitter account, @AmznMovieRevws, where he collects screenshots of reviews he finds to be humorous or interesting. The account has been featured online on the likes of MTV, Business Insider, and Comedy Central and was recently named “One of the Things You Need to Follow to Be Culturally Relevant in 2016″ by Wired Magazine. Joe resides in Iowa and uses his Twitter as an outlet for his interests while being stuck in the Midwest. He is also a Diamondbacks fan.”

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The Hall of Very Good™ Class of 2016 is presented by Out of the Park Developments, the creators of the wildly popular baseball simulation game Out of the Park Baseball. Out of the Park Developments has made a generous donation to The Hall.