The Sports Daily > Metstradamus Blog
Trimming The Fat (Even If They Are Relatively In Shape)

According to reports, the Mets are about to non-tender three of their players (which is the reverse of when the President pardons a small group of thanksgiving turkeys). Let’s look at the pros and cons of getting rid of each player:

Manny Acosta: The only things that Manny Acosta accomplished in his Mets career was A) Drive me nuts, and for some reason B) Become a viable option out of the bullpen in the baseball game that I downloaded for my phone. That doesn’t really speak to the accuracy of the game, but hell … it was free. You get what you pay for … which sums up Acosta’s Mets career. So see ya, Manny. I’m sure the next time our paths will cross you will have found some sort of career rejuvenation somewhere else, and you’ll strike out three Mets with the bases loaded and nobody out.

Andres Torres: Should have known it was going to be a long and fruitful Mets career when he injured himself in the fifth inning of the season. He got one hit in a Mets uniform … and had it taken away because he missed the base. For a complete recap of Andres Torres’ Mets legacy, click here.

Mike Pelfrey: And now we come to the sad end of a blue and orange legacy for a former number one draft pick. Micheal Alan Pelfrey, the center of many arguments about what his ceiling could be in the Mets rotation, seems destined to finally hit the floor and become an ex-Met (shocked face above). Of course, Little Pelf could be non-tendered and then brought back on a minor league contract. But what would be the point … except to hang out with the rest of the busted rock stars turned lounge acts in Las Vegas while pitching for the 51’s? Pelfrey would probably do better to fill out some other second tier team’s flawed rotation at the back end, leading a nomadic Aaron Harang type life eating innings and Twinkies (not necessarily in that order.)

But like I said: Pelfrey could come back. And if he does, he’ll be ready:

Hey that’s great! One hundred pitches in a fictional game that takes place in the dead of winter! I’m excited. How much do you think the Mets would charge for Promenade seats to that tilt? Since it would now … technically … be Opening Day. And how many of those 100 pitches would be sent sailing over the wall by Chase Utley, Ryan Howard, and Mike Schmidt? 54? 78? 99? It wouldn’t be 100 because the cold January air would keep at least one of those fly balls in the park.

Note to Mike Pelfrey: The season does not start on January 15th!!! If it did, then that would mean that either the World Baseball Classic was expanded to six months and 36 teams (don’t doubt Bud Selig would do it), or global warming has really messed things up. In which case, maybe all 100 of Mike Pelfrey’s pitches would leave the yard … some of them on bunts. And some of those baseballs might burn up on re-entry. Drink lots of water.