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The Sports Daily > The Pensblog
GAMEDAY 12: Zombies

PITTSBURGH PENGUINS VS MINNESOTA WILD

XCEL ENERGY CENTER – MINNEAPOLIS, MN

5:00 PM EST. AT&T SN PITTSBURGH

Never, in the history of the NHL, has a team fought harder to merely exist than the Minnesota Wild. Since the North Stars fled the barren tundra of Minneapolis, fans and pundits alike clamored, whined, wailed, screamed, until, finally, their team was brought back to life….

And I’m here to tell you, ya’ll should have left that shit dead.

Since their inception the Zombie North Stars have been doing anything they can to make you see them as a real boy.

Sign the two biggest free agents in the same class?

Yup.

Two good ol’ American boys? Yup

“GIVE US AN OUTDOOR GAME SO WE CAN SHOW YOU THE TRUE NATURE AND BEAUTY OF THE NORTH!!!” Yup

Oh, and even hire a coach with an (almost) championship pedigree?

Yup.

The Wild’s entire freaking existence has been one long existential shout into the void. Please. Anyone. NOTICE US.

Some things are meant to stay dead, never to roam the earth again, and when you go against all that the universe is telling you shall be so, the universe will punish you. And that is how you end up with Chris Stewart and Eric Staal as your leading scorers.

Lines:

Pittsburgh:

Guentzel-Crosby-Sheary

Rust-Malkin-Kessel

Hagelin-Sheahan-Kuhnhackl

Kuhnhackl-McKegg-Reaves

Dumoulin-Letang

Maatta-Rooweedle

Cole-guy

Murray-Desmith

Minnesota:

Zucker-Koivu-Granlund

Ennis-Staal-Kunin

Folingo-Eriksson Ek-Stewart

Winnik-Cullen-Mitchell

Suter-Spurgeon

Reilly-Brodin

Quincey-Dumba

Dubnyk-Stalock

I guess the only other thing worth mentioning is Matt Cullen plays for Minnesota now. I’m pretty unmoved by any player trades/movement/signings anymore, but even this one stung a little. Cullen was everything that Craig Adams and every other 4th line dipshit that Shero and Bylsma threw out onto the ice for years.

Miss you Dad.

The opening to this post is still true though. Just ask this guy.

Image result for minnesota sucks gif

Go Pens.

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