I get wicked. You got a booger, pick it.
-That dude from House of Pain, “Guess Who’s Back?”
Anyway, yes. We resume the search of all things internetical in order to keep you, the loyal followers of this here blog, an informed and united constituency.
We’ll keep you up on what the other mopes, chodes, and “journalists” have to say about the NHL, the Metro division in particular, as well as WBS and Wheeling. Oh, and any other particularly hilarious shit. Sophmoric irreverance be damned.
And away we go.
The only players on pace for 100 points right now are Sidney Crosby and … Mark Scheifele and Nick Foligno.
— Adam Gretz (@AGretz) November 13, 2016
Rags have been off to a pretty hot start. But the surprising part has been their offense. They have a +27 goal differential through the first 15 games. Jimmy Vesey has looked like what everybody said he could possibly be.
Michael Grabner was a great signing. I’m sure he’ll have at least a couple game-shifting moments against the Pens. Not thrilled to have him back on a division foe from NYC.
Caps are 9-4-1. They’ve had a bit of a mixed start to the season, after getting turd-whalloped by the bottom-dwelling Canes. Because its always a good time in D.C. to come up with excuses. Trotz and Co. are looking to their PP to pick it up a bit, and a familiar face continues to defy the idea that he was lucky to cash in after limited success.
The Jackets put up 8 against STL after 5-2 loss to Boston. Jack Johnson continues to suffer the after effects of having dogshit parents. (Having nothing to do with be an overrated defenseman.) This time it cost him his Ferrari.
Philly is off to a .500 start. There really isn’t anything worthwhile to say about them at this point. Flyers fans have been occupying their garbage lives with pretending they loved newly honored HHOFer Eric Lindros and that their organization and media didn’t do everything from call him a baby to accusing him of having mafia ties.
The Islanders are a bag of jokes right now and everyone knows it. They’re trying to trade their best goaltender away because of the confidence the organization has in one Thomas Greiss. That really says a lot, right there. Might be interesting to see if a deal happens, if only to see where the goalie market is right now.
Baby Pens are off to a very strong 9-2-1 start under Clark Donatelli.
Jake Guentzel and Carter Rowney are putting up nice numbers on offense. They have the 2nd besk PK in the AHL. Tristan Jarry and Casey DeSmith are playing lights out. Hell, maybe we should just trade Fleury and Murray, right? (Hyperbole, folks.) Kevin Porter did catch a one game suspension for this hit:
VIDEO: Slow motion replay of the hit that got Kevin Porter suspended a game 11/11 vs. Toronto: pic.twitter.com/T4mnjPP0W8
— Jason Iacona (@nafsnep) November 13, 2016
Nailers are off to a solid start. They’re 6-3-1.
The Rest Of The Mess
— Blake (@CoolHipsterName) November 13, 2016
If you’re like me and still don’t understand advanced stats, Down Goes Brown will try to help you.
Obviously, thoughts go out to Bryan Bickell after his recent MS diagnosis.
Glad to have the first post of the season out of the way. Let’s have some fun out there.