Magglio Ordonez Gets a Haircut; Chops Off His Powerless Locks

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magglio long hairmagglio locks

As Magglio’s luscious locks fell to the ground, so did all my A.C. Slater references.  The long, curly Sue hair that baseball fans, particularly Detroit fans, have grown accustomed to was snipped off today, similarly to the way his manhood has seeminly been snipped of late.

By that I mean Magglio hasn’t hit like a true man in a while.  His last home run was April 27 and he has just two total this season.  With the 90+ degree humidity and his lack of power, Magglio must have felt it was time to make a hairstyle change.

Some of you might think, “big deal, the dude got a haircut.” But you don’t understand.  It’s a big deal.  He had the long hair do for almost four years.  It became a signature. In fact, people made money off of it, too.  For example, Comerica Park would hold “Magglio Ordonez hat with hair days” and others sold silhouette t-shirts of it

According to Magglio, the hair could still wind up making money, though:

“I’m going to put it on eBay and give the money to a charity for kids,”

Sounds like something only Cool Ethan would be interested in.

Here’s to the fresh cut having Magglio looking and hitting like it’s 2002.

[h/t to Bless You Boys who broke the story to me first]

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