If I were the Bills GM: Volume IV

If you were to look at the premiere dynasties in NFL history, the majority of those franchises started from the bottom of the barrel. Before the Pittsburgh Steelers dominated the 70’s; they were being dominated in the 60’s. Before Joe Montana was guiding the 49ers to four championships in 8 years; they were the joke of the 70’s. Before the Bills were circling the wagons in the 90’s; they were circling down the drain in the mid 80’s. You can include the Cowboys of the 90’s in that conversation as well.

All that losing brought in an influx of high draft picks. The majority of those high draft picks were developed into great players. Those great players were then developed into becoming great teams. Those great teams became even greater dynasties…You get the point. Sure, they had a Charles Haley or a Matt Millen here and there, but those teams were built through youth and drafting.

Over the last 10 years the Bills have been run by two regimes; The Donahoe and Brandon empires. The biggest mistake that both czars made was not going through a full blown youth movement. Yes, Donahoe did strip the team in 2001, but he made the mistake of having his core players being guys who had only 2-3 years left in the tank. As for Russ Brandon, he was too busy trying to find a player to market to the fan base; while ignoring the major problems of the Bills.

My extreme makeover edition of the Buffalo Bills will consist of trying to unload some of my veterans for draft picks. Sorry Bills veterans, but I’m building a team that can compete for the next 5 years. As your GM, I can tell you that youth is going to be served. This team needs to be blown up. I already went through my roster of restricted and unrestricted free agents. Now it’s time to trim the fat off this roster and really start building for the future.

Chris Kelsay
Chris my friend, I know you had one of your best years to date, but you just don’t fit in the Bills 3-4 defense. You’re too small to play defensive end and I don’t have the patience to convert a 30-year old player to an OLB. Not to mention you’re pocketing way too much money for my taste. Because of your salary, I doubt anyone would take you off my hands for a draft pick. Sorry, but the Bills are going to have to find a new defensive captain.

Future: Cut from the Bills

Aaron Schobel
Aaron, I don’t like you and you don’t like me. I’ve always thought that you’ve been overpaid and very susceptible against the run. You have always rubbed me the wrong way with telling the public that sacks are overrated. However, you did put together your best season since 2006. But, you’re on the wrong side of 30. Besides age, the biggest problem for you is that the Bills are going to a 3-4 defense and you’re too small to play end. I already have to convert Aaron Maybin to an OLB. So just like Chris Kelsay, I don’t have the patience to convert a veteran to that spot.

Now, the rumors around the campfire consist of you wanting to retire because you want to be closer to home in Texas. Personally, I think a lot of it has to do with you not wanting to endure another rebuilding process with the Bills. I think you’re at a point in your career where you’re sick of losing and want to win. So with that being said, I’m sending you to the Raiders (Just kidding). I think trading you to the Houston Texans should make you feel right at home. I think the Texans would be crazy in not wanting Schobel and Mario Williams on both ends. The Texans are sick and tired of being the Colts B#$ch. In order to beat those guys, you’re going to have to put pressure on Peyton Manning.

As far as looking at my trade sheet, I think the Bills could be able to squeeze out a 2nd round pick from the Texans. Jason Taylor was 33-years old when he was traded to the Redskins for a 2nd and 7th round pick. I’ll tell you what, I’ll sweeten the pot.

Kyle my man, you were
arguably my best defensive player from last year. You’re an up and coming defensive tackle in the NFL. You’re a pro bowl alternate. You’re the type of player that I would love to find in the 4th round of the draft every year. Unfortunately, all of those reasons are not going to save you from the chopping block.

Look, you’re the reason why I wasn’t a big fan of converting to a 3-4 defense. Had I been named the Bills GM in January, I would have vetoed against Chan Gailey in scrapping the 4-3. But you’re too small to play nose tackle and too slow to play defensive end. No worries, Kyle. I will be sending you somewhere that I think you’ll enjoy. The Bills tried trading one of their defensive tackles to this team last year, but it didn’t work out. I think the Indianapolis Colts would be very interested in acquiring the services of Williams. He has a nice cap friendly contract and would fit like a glove in their cover 2 defense.

Listen Marshawn, my venom towards your extra curricular activities aren’t as strong as some in the WNY community. However, it’s time to send you packing. Like I’ve said all along, when your agent says that you’re being targeted by Buffalo cops, then it’s time for you to go into witness protection. Plus, I think Fred Jackson will be more than an adequate replacement. The rumors around the campfire consist of you being linked to the San Diego Chargers. So, we may as well go there. I think the Bills have an outside chance at getting a 3rd rounder for Lynch. I look at Lynch’s trade value the same way as what the Bills got for Travis Henry (3rd round pick from the Titans in 2005). The Chargers have the 91st pick in the draft, just 5 spots away from the start of the 4th round. With the Chargers cutting LT and having the pressure of advancing far in the playoffs, the Chargers may have to roll the dice with acquiring a talented player like Lynch.

Purposed Trade: Marshawn Lynch to the Chargers for a 3rd round pick.

Marcus, I wasn’t exactly thrilled with you laughing at the prospect of playing nose tackle. I do think you’re being paid a little too much for what your production has warranted. However, I think if you lost some weight you may become a decent defensive end in the 3-4 defense. I can’t just cut everyone on the defensive line. I think the Bills need some sort of veteran leadership on the defensive side of the ball. You’re safe for now, but more than likely you’ll be put out to pasture next year.

Trent, you’re not even worthy of a demotion to the Portland Pirates or the Buffalo Bisons (Hell, add the Blizzard and Destroyers to the list). You’ve been a disaster, and I’m definitely not into giving you a second chance. You can’t stay healthy, you can’t complete a pass of more than 10 yards, and your team has completely lost confidence in you. If I can get a 6th round pick for you, I’d take it. But honestly, since the fans are always looking for a marketing ploy to get them excited about Bills football, I think cutting you outright would deliver the message that status quo is history!

Future: Cut from the Bills with thunderous applause.

Look, I know some of you may be second guessing what I got in return from some of these players. In defense of the moves: The Colts were willing to give up a 4th round pick for John McCargo last year and need help at the defensive tackle spot. Williams is a lot better than what McCargo was last year. Hell, at least Kyle Williams has started in his career. As for Lynch, I know most fans despise the guy and think he’s a punk. However, you can’t deny his talent and the Chargers are in need of a back.

As for the pillage of my defensive line, the Bills decided that it was in their best interest in going to a 3-4 defense. In order for a 3-man front to be effective, you’re going to need three defensive tackles. The Bills have way too many skinny and old defensive ends to convert to linebackers. I’m not in the business to wait 1-2 years for Chris Kelsay or Aaron Schobel to come around as linebackers. As for Kyle Williams, it’s bittersweet to let him go, but this is a move that had to
be made because he’s too small to play NT and not fast enough to play end.

However, what should be taken out of these deals is that I have set the foundation for the Bills to make some noise in April. Through my trades, the Bills have gained one 1st round pick (From the Lee Evans deal), one 2nd round pick (From the Aaron Schobel deal) and three 3rd round picks (From the Kyle Williams, Lee Evans and Marshawn Lynch deals). That’s seven picks (eight picks if the Kevin Kolb deal doesn’t go through) within the first 100 picks of what some experts are calling one of the deepest drafts ever. I’ve also been able to clear some payroll in order to go out and sign some key free agents. That my friends…is how you blow the whole dam thing up.

Do you agree with these moves? Are there any players on the Bills roster you’d like to kick off the team? Do you wish Tom Donahoe was back? Let the second guessing begin.