Pirates Sign Former Tiger Pitcher Jason Grilli to Bolster Draft Position

The Pittsburgh Pirates, baffled by their team’s recent stretch of wins, have signed veteran relief pitcher Jason Grilli to hopefully boost their draft stock next season. Grilli, as you may remember, played a key role in helping the Tigers land prospects such as Andrew Miller and Rick Porcello. He also pioneered the battery-powered goggles with lens wipers, a cutting-edge look that still has yet to catch on in the mainstream fashion industry.

Jason Grilli goggles

Pirates GM Neal Huntington explained the signing earlier today. “We felt like we weren’t where we wanted to be draft position-wise, so we went out and got someone that could help us in that area. Jason is a guy that can lose some ball games for you, and that’s what we need if we’re going to get another top 10 pick.”

Pirates manager Clint Hurdle was equally enthused. “The key to managing is keeping your team happy. Some of the guys in the bullpen weren’t happy that Joel Hanrahan was putting up great numbers because it made them look bad. Bringing Jason into the fold helps us even that out. I think the rest of the guys will be happier.”

[MLB]
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