Tigers Create Cyborg Pitcher "Max Fister" for the Playoffs

Tigers Create Cyborg Pitcher "Max Fister" for the Playoffs

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Tigers Create Cyborg Pitcher "Max Fister" for the Playoffs

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In preparation for what could be a long and grueling postseason, the Tigers have put their fate in the hands of science. Manager Jim Leyland, instead of agonizing who should start Game 2 of the Divisional Series, has come up with a better idea. By combining the talents of current starters Max Scherzer and Doug Fister, the Tigers will be able to use cyborg pitcher Max Fister to crush all that is evil in the next month or so.

Max Fister

This prototype takes the control and efficiency (and awesome name) of Doug Fister and combines it with the electric stuff and crazy eyes of Max Scherzer. While tests are still inconclusive, it’s probably the closest thing to cloning Justin Verlander that we’ve been able to find. Whether Max Fister will be a success remains to be seen. Until then, we just have to hope that Rick Porcello decides to actually start pitching well again, or we might be screwed.

[pic via Bless You Boys]

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