The Rod Allen Drinking Game was originally created by Big Al at the now-defunct Wayne Fontes Experience and has since been updated over the years by D4L (and one year at Walk Off Woodward). It has officially become cemented as a drunken-staple in the Detroit sports community. And it’s not just a brainless, alcoholic’s activity, either — there are things you can learn from playing. If your livers survived gaming experience in years past, put ’em to the test again in 2015.
As you may have heard, Rod Allen is slowly being phased out of the Detroit Tigers broadcast booth, for better (for your livers) or for worse. Rod will reportedly only work 79 games in 2015 and on at least two occasions there will be a crowded 3-man booth (Kirk Gibson and Jack Morris join the FSD family). So make sure you know when Rod’s working the booth and your fridge is stocked for the big fella. Make ’em count.
DRINKING GAME v6.0
*If Rod is working a game, you better be drinking — you only have 79 this year!
*If Rod is on national television, all drinks are doubled.
*If Rod is part of 3-man booth, throw your empty cans/bottles at the TV when they show the third guy (all due respect to Gibby and Jack Morris, but they’re ruining the RADG!)
* Before the game, decide on one of these commercials (Belle Tire, Little Caesars, Bernstein’s or Dr. Rahmani, ACE Hardware) and drink 3 each time the selected commercial comes on. Also drink three when a local/regional commercial comes on (H/T @TheCaseDogg)
1 DRINK ——————————————————
When Rod says the Tigers have the best fans in baseball, everyone must raise their beverage and take one drink (drink double if the Tigers are on the road).
When Rod says, “without question.”
When Rod responds to Mario by saying, “good point.”
When Rod says, “legit.”
When Rod says, “oh, for sure” or “no doubt”
When Rod makes any kind of reference to a player or his ability being “special.” (drink double if it’s about Cespedes’ arm)
When Rod starts a sentence with “for whatever reason” or “make no mistake.”
When Rod starts a sentence with “call me crazy, but…”
When Rod says “big fella” (drink double if he is referring to someone other than Miguel Cabrera or Yoenis Cespedes).
When Rod says “cheese” in reference to a pitch (drink double if Rod is actually talking about cheese).
When Rod says “look no further.”
When Rod does the “Belle Tire Pitch-by-Pitch.”
When Rod mentions a sponsor.
When Rod says “He got all of that!”
When Rod says “out of the gate”
When Rod mentions the Kinsler for Fielder trade (double if their commercial is mentioned or played)
2 DRINKS —————————————————
Whenever FOX shows a player who has a noticeable dip (chewing tobacco) in their mouth. Double if it is Justin Verlander. Triple (that’s 6, math fans) if a player is in the middle of putting it in. (H/T @TheCaseDogg)
Whenever A FOX Sports Detroit girl is shown or mentioned.
3 DRINKS —————————————————
When Rod calls Mario, “pahdnuh.”
When Rod says, “I see you _____!”
When Rod is shown in the booth, all players must yell, “I see you, Rod!” and drink 3.
When a player shows bunt and Rod mentions this as being a “good idea.”
When Rod defends the bullpen
When Rod says that a player or coach can “flat out” do something.
When Rod starts a sentence with “them boys.”
When Rod butchers a name (drink double if it’s a newcomer) (h/t @displacedtgrfan)
When Rod refers to Yoenis Cespedes by a nickname (drink double if it’s new)
When Rod classifies something as a “major league,” such as a hit or an at bat.
When Rod refers to an opposing player by a nickname (i.e. calls Felix Hernandez “King Felix”).
When Rod identifies a pitch as a “piece” (i.e. “change piece” or “slide piece”).
When Rod says that a hit was “majestic.”
When Rod wears hipster-chic black rimmed glasses.
When Rod refers to a players as “the absolute truth.”
When Rod says the phrase “professional hitter” or “professional pitcher.”
When Rod and Mario are wearing their FSN Detroit polos.
When Rod says, “filthy”
When Rod incorrectly answers the trivia question. (Drink double if he answers it correctly)
When Rod says that a pitcher has “easy gas.” (drink double if he talks about Justin Verlander’s dip in velocity)
When Rod talks about food (drink double if the Tigers are in Kansas City and Rod is talking about barbecue; finish your drink if Rod plugs a specific local restaurant)
When Rod plugs a ticket package or fan giveaway (drink double if it’s for the Red Wings, Lions, or Pistons)
When Rod says, “it’s better to be lucky than good.”
Whenever Rod reads the in game promo (double if it’s Tigers fantasy camp).
Whenever Rod says, “April in the D.” (triple if it is not April when said)
Whenever Rod appears in a non-Fox Sports Detroit related commercial.
When Rod mentions Miguel Carbera’s Triple Crown (double if he talks about “Cabby” getting another)
When Rod says “bullpen-by-committee.”
When Rod mentions Joe Nathan’s relationship with the fans
When Rod gushes over the Tigers batting lineup (double if he says it’s THE best in the AL).
When Rod mentions “Mr. I” (double if he talks about Mr. I’s desperation to win a World Series; triple if he talks about Mr. I’s health)
When Rod mentions Nick Castellanos (or any young player) and that cat’s bright future with the club
When Rod calls Craig Monroe “C-Mo”
When the 2006 team is mentioned (drink double if Magglio’s walk-off homer in the ALCS is specifically mentioned)
Whenever Rod refers to Kirk Gibson and/or Jack Morris as “teammate” (h/t @KleShreen) or talks about them joining the “family” (drink double if he calls one of them “pahdnuh”)
5 DRINKS ————————————————
Whenever Rod says he talked to someone before the game. (Double if this comes at “batting practice”)
When showing the fans, you spot a Rod Allen poster (double if on the road).
Whenever Rod “feels sorry for the (opposing team/player)” after a pitchers stuff is especially “filthy” that day
When a Tigers player shows bunt and Rod does not mention it being a good idea.
When Rod says “stop it _____.” This usually comes when an opposing player is having a great game against the Tigers, but can also apply to Tiger doing really well
When Rod says that a player “better come correct.”
When Rod asks, “are you serious?!”
When Rod praises Ausmus for doing something different than Leyland. Such as running more (double the drinks if the move backfires. Naturally).
When Rod describes someone as being “old school.”
When Rod says the phrase, “the unintentional, intentional walk.”
When Rod says something is a “remedy for success.”
When Rod says, “big fly!”
Whenever Rod describes a pitch or a line drive as an “absolute seed.”
Whenever Rod says, “cat.”
Whenever Rod says a pitcher is throwing a “steady diet” of a certain pitch.
Whenever Rod asks, “are you kidding me?”
Whenever Rod sends out a tweet during the game.
Whenever Rod says a play got “into one’s kitchen.”
Whenever John Keating interrupts the game with highlights from around the MLB. (0 drinks if it is anyone else)
When Rod refers to Justin Verlander, Miguel Cabrera or ex-Tiger Max Scherzer as “Gettin’ paid.” (Double if Rod mentions David Price’s impending free agency)
When Rod says, “ribeyes” or “steaks” when talking about runs batted in.
When Rod or Mario mention Brandon Inge, Ramon Santiago, Jeremy Bonderman or Don Kelly
7 DRINKS ————————————————
Whenever Rod intentionally spells something out incorrectly to make a point: (That boy is B-A-D-D, bad! or Yoenis Cespedes is getting B-I-Z-Z-Y, busy! Or someone is S-M-O-O-V-E, smooth!)
When Rod describes someone as being “country strong!” (triple if he is still talking about Marcus Thames)
When Rod says the phrase, “oh no he didn’t.”
When Rod says, “baseball’s a great game.”
Whenever Rod says a player “looks good in his uniform.” (double if he is talking about Brad Ausmus)
When Rod specifically talks about how handsome Brad Ausmus is (or the ladies loving Ausmus)
When Rod says, “contact to damage ratio.” (double if it is “off the chain”)
When Rod refers to FOX as “Big FOX.”
When Rod says that a pitcher is throwing “itty bitty ones.”
When the footage of Justin Verlander and Trevor Thompson getting doused with Gatorade after Verlander’s second no-hitter is shown
When Rod refers to Justin Verlander’s Taco Bell diet
Whenever Rod incorrectly uses the word “literally.”
When Rod talks about Anthony Gose resembling Austin Jackson
Whenever cotton candy is mentioned.
Whenever Rod describes his (or anybody else’s) physique as being “puffy.” (Drink double if he talks about Joba Chamberlain’s body)
When Rod mentions Chamberlain’s son as being instrumental in Joba coming back (h/t @mikegervais)
When Rod asks Mario if he got his workout in this morning (double if it’s a home game). (H/T @bisonmessink)
When Rod mentions another happening with another Detroit sports team (drink double if he suggests one of their players could help the club)
When Rod gazes lovingly at a guest in the booth (see picture)
When Rod mentions Kate Upton (drink 15 if he mentions her as “Ms. Upton” and/or while talking about her relationship with Justin Verlander) (H/T @GrantChilds)
8 DRINKS ————————————————
When Rod references his time with the 84 Tigers, take as many drinks as hits (8) that he had with the 84 Tigers.
Whenever Rod describes a player’s spin move as a “pirouette”
When showing the fans, you spot a Rod Allen poster where he is dressed up as Luigi. (double if on the road)
Whenever Rod makes the statement “some kind of _____.” i.e. “Some kind of smooth” or “Some kind of good.”
When Rod references Mario’s “fancy” education or large pay checks.
When Rod calls for the suicide squeeze.
When Rod says, “game within the game.”
Whenever Rod uses a malapropism. (H/T ewigginton)
Whenever Rod references his playing time in Japan.
10 DRINKS ———————————————
When Rod says that a broken bat “died a hero” on a hit.
When Rod openly questions a decision made by Ausmus (finish your drink if Ausmus has been ejected and Rod is questioning acting manager).
When Rod says the Tigers are “beatin’ on the (opposing pitcher) like he stole something!”
When Rod says a player is “stylin’ and profling.”
When Rod says “get on with your bad self!”
When Rod says “buggy whipped.”
Whenever a Tigers player gets a shaving cream pie to the face in a post-game interview.
12 DRINKS ——————————————
Anytime Rod offends a specific race of people. (H/T @andrewschreck)
Anytime Rod makes an awkward comment about Kirk Gibson and/or Jack Morris stealing some of his broadcasts (h/t @tresf333)
When Rod and Mario dress up for the Tigers’ promotional theme day and FOX shows it (see image)
When Rod gets left hanging on-air [H/T IASID]
When Rod mentions Beyonce, Miley Cyrus, Justin Timberlake and/or Justin Bieber (drink double if he mentions the Justin Bieber roast)
20 DRINKS ——————————————
When the footage of Rod charging the mound in Japan is shown (15 if it’s only referenced).
When Rod mentions the “Rod Allen Drinking Game” on the air or on twitter. (Double if he mentions Detroit4lyfe)
THE GENERAL SILLINESS CLAUSE:
Two drinks may be had when Rod displays general silliness. This rule can be applied in group or in individual play and can be declared before the game or invoked when the silliness occurs. General silliness can be loosely interpreted, as that’s why it’s not technically part of the rules. Experienced players will recognize this activity, which can include stepping over the play-by-play with yelps, screams or any array of noises, use of non-words, abundant laughing, or appearing overly giddy.
*Play responsibly, my friends.