Dear Colorado Rockies,
Hi, how are you doing? We hate to bother you right in the middle of the season like this, but we need a favor. It is kind of asking a lot, but hear us out. We really need you to stop winning… immediately.
We know it sounds selfish, but you starting to win is really messing with the Angels’ plans to fix their bullpen. Your closer, Huston Street, is just the kind of reliever the Halos need to be trading for and until recently, it seemed like he was destined to have a For Sale sign hung around his neck by now. Then your stupid little team had to go on a giant winning streak. Seriously, that is just in poor taste.
Two weeks ago you were 20-32 and fresh off of firing the manager that took you to the World Series two years ago. That is the very definition of bottoming out. Perhaps it was a bit presumptuous of us to start circling your seemingly rotting carcass looking to start picking off the spare parts. Had we known that you were going to rattle off eleven wins in a row and put yourself back into the NL Wild Card mix we probably would have been more tactful about it, but can you blame us? We didn’t mean to offend you, we’re just looking out for number one.
So anyway, we’re really sorry if we made you mad or anything, but we still would like to talk to you about Street. Surely you are feeling pretty high on the hog after rattling off such an impressive winning streak, as you rightly should. But let’s be real for a minute here, do you really think you can keep that pace up? I mean, you did just win eleven consecutive games and you are still only a .500 ballclub. You don’t really think you are a legitimate contender do you? There is a reason you started off so poorly after all. Plus, with the Dodgers running away with the division that means you are stuck muddling for the Wild Card with ten other National League teams. Those just aren’t great odds.
Why not start thinking a little bit more about the future? You’re a young team, you’ve got a lot of good years left in you to contend. So why not throw the aging Angels a bone here and help them out in the short-term and they’ll scratch your back in return by helping you build for the future. Everybody wins. All you’ve got to do is fork over Huston Street. Is that so much to ask?
If you think about it, you could probably trade Street to the Angels and still find away to stay in the race. Manny Corpas has closed before, just give him the job. Yes, he has had a rough season, but he’s been pitching a lot better lately. Heck, you might even be able to get a nice major-league ready relief prospect in return for Street to lessen the impact in the bullpen. Kevin Jepsen would look awfully nice in black pinstripes. Or perhaps we could interest you in something a little more starter-ish. Trevor Reckling is getting close to major-league ready and generates a lot of groundballs, perfect for the Colorado altitude.
Don’t forget either that this might be your last real chance to get great value for Huston Street. Not to be a buzzkill, but you aren’t that profitable of a club and Street is going to get a big payday in arbitration this off-season with how well he is pitching right now. He’ll be a lot harder to trade when his salary doubles and becomes a one-year (or less) rental player. That is just poor asset management. But at the same time we realize how hard it would be to sell your fans on trading away a such a talented player, that is why you need to start losing again. It would just make the sell job a lot easier for everyone. Don’t embarrass yourself or anything, but a nice five-game skid would do the trick.
Thanks so much for your time. Let us know when you are ready to start losing again so we can get this trade worked out. It should really make everyone a lot happier. Talk to you soon.
Regards,
Monkey With a Halo
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