Which free agent will the Angels forfeit their first round pick for this off-season?

The season is drawing to a close and it is becoming readily apparent that the Angels aren't going to finish in the bottom ten of the league meaning their first round draft pick isn't going to be protected. Yup, with ten games left the Angels are 4.5 games up on the final protected draft pick slot with several teams to leapfrog just to get there.

Man! These guys can't even suck right, amirite? Am I right? Or am I right, amirite?

Thanks to their unconscionable act of not raising the white flag and rolling over for all of their opponents, the Halos are now certain to forfeit their first round pick in 2014. I mean, if the league can't stop them from forfeiting the pick, what hope is there that the Angels will finally develop some self-control and stop themselves? Like an alcoholic trapped in a liquor store overnight, they are powerless against their addiction and last time I checked the Betty Ford Clinic doesn't have a rehab program for baseball executives addicted to making short-sighted personnel moves. I'm not saying they should start offering that program, but it does seem like there is a market for it.

So, let's face it, that pick is as good as gone. The question is who will be the lucky player they pick to forfeit it in favor of and thus subject that player to a year of scrutiny from fans who pine for that draft pick and that mythical player that the Halos would've drafted to help them some time in 2017. Won't someone please think of the 2017 Angels?

Robinson Cano – The top free agent hitter on the market, therefore Arte Moreno loves him already. You can just see him drawing up another contract worth over a quarter of a billion dollars right now. And wouldn't is just be the most Moreno move ever to have the team trade Kendrick for a young starting pitcher only to sign Cano for ten times money Kendrick would've made and forfeit a first round pick in the process?

Jacoby Ellsbury – WE CAN HAZ ALL THE CENTREFEELDERZ? Ellsbury is going to get a qualifying offer, so why not? He is this year's odds on favorite to get an absurd contract and immediately become a huge bust. So, sign him, cough up the pick and trade Bourjos to clear the logjam even though Bourjos is a fifty times cheaper and not all that much less productive or injury-prone than Ellsbury. It's a great opportunity for a double whammy.

Matt Garza – Why re-sign Zack Greinke and keep your pick when you can wait a year, forfeit your pick and overpay an overrated pitcher to fill the void Greinke left? Besides, what could possibly go wrong with the Angels signing a former Ranger with a history of behavioral problems?

Shin-Soo Choo – You know what? I think I better skip Choo. This is supposed to be a tongue-in-cheek but every time I go to write something on Choo I get dangerously close to talking myself into the Angels signing him. I'm moving on before I give Dipoto and Moreno any ideas.

Ervin Santana – The laws of irony demand this happen. Santana is definitely going to get a qualifying offer. He frustrated Angel fans for so many years, so it would be his masterstroke to return to the Angels on a stupid contract and cost the team a draft pick in the process.

Kendrys Morales – There is already speculation that the Angels might bring K-Mo back if they trade Mark Trumbo. That makes some sense on the surface, but it turns out that the Mariners are so desperate for anything resembling a competent bat that they are believed to be planning a qualifying offer for Morales. That would be incredibly stupid, but, well, Mariners. But if there is one organization that can out-stupid Seattle in free agency it is the Angels who could expose their own stupidity by letting Vargas walk without a qualifying offer and then signing the player they traded for him a year ago and throwing away the pick in the process.

Tim Lincecum – Dipoto loves him so high risk/high reward pitching gambles, so why not throw all caution to the wind and sign Lincecum to a contract that they will surely regret since Dipoto is the anti-Midas when it comes to these high risk moves and flush away the draft pick at the same time?

Or maybe the Angels will just take this whole farm system thing seriously at long last. Maybe, just maybe, Dipoto (or whoever the GM will be) understands how costly it is to forfeit a first round pick. Maybe.