Complete this sentence: The Angels go into the All-Star break red hot and emerge from it…
Your response was probably something similar to “fall on their face” because that is typically what unfolds in this scenario for the Halos. Last year they won 15 of 17 headed into the break and emerged from the break by dropping four of seven. In 2012, they won three of four before the break and then won just three of nine after the break, a pretty damning sequence for a team that just barely missed the playoffs. In 2011, they won 14 of 17 before the break and then lost four of five after the break. I think you get the point.
Now the Angels are going to try and prove that this clearly observable pattern is just a mere coincidence. Nobody expects them to continue being so exceptionally good, but playing above .500 would be very welcome since the AL West break is still tight. Also, winning is just more fun. Hopefully the underperforming Red Sox oblige and let the Halos avoid a cold start. So long as they NEVER pitch to Mike Napoli, I think the Angels will be just fine.
Game 1: C.J. Wilson vs. Wade Miley
I can’t imagine a worse starter to kick things off after the All-Star break when you are trying to avoid stumbling out of the gate than C.J. “Who knows what you’re going to get” Wilson. He’s been all over the map lately, so we could see him throw a shutout or not make it out of the third inning because he insists on trying to challenge Mike Napoli. Yeah, that’s totally going to happen. I’m pre-upset about it. Fortunately, Wilson is facing Wade Miley, who has been dreadful this year because he apparently angered the FIP gods.
Game 2: Garrett Richards vs. Rick Porcello
To keep up the trend of potential disappointment, Garrett Richards is up next after his disturbingly poor outing against the beleaguered Seattle offense. He was more hittable than we’d ever seen and continues to struggle with the longball. He seldom struggles for long, but he also has had a hard time maintaining his dominant stuff for a few starts in a row. Once again, the Red Sox counter with another starting pitcher with an ERA-FIP gap larger than the Laurentian Abyss.
Game 3: Hector Santiago vs. Eduardo Rodriguez
Poor Hector Santiago never got to actually pitch in the All-Star Game. Surely he will be amped up to show the world that he truly is a legit All-Star. Considering that this game is going to be on ESPN Sunday Night Baseball, Santiago has the perfect showcase to do just that. He also has the perfect opportunity to try waaaaaaaaaaay too hard and end up taking a dump all over the mound. To make matter worse, the Red Sox are starting a rookie that the Angels have never seen before, and we all know what that means.
Game 4: ¯_(ツ)_/¯ vs. ¯_(ツ)_/¯
The teams are apparently keeping their starters a secret because if they told us, they would have to kill us.
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