If Dany Heatley takes a dump in the woods, and no one is around to smell it, does anyone care?

(the answer is No!)

Look, I’m all for checking out the latest hockey trade rumors and scuttlebutt just as much as the next puckhead is. But when the hockey news of the day is shit like “Dany Heatley will not attend Jason Spezza’s wedding” – it’s gotten a bit out of control. Because first off, great for the future Mr. & Mrs. Spezza, but I don’t give a crap about their wedding. If I don’t give a crap about their wedding, then I certainly don’t give a crap about who is or isn’t attending. Come on, people. Get a grip. Get outside and smell the fresh terds air, will ya?