The World Naked Bike Ride – What Is This About?

A few years ago my wife and I were driving down Hawthorne Blvd with our daughter, who was 4 years old at the time, and we drove by the popular food cart hub on SE 12^th. Looking out our windows we saw two men standing in line with their bicycles at one of the carts wearing only knee high socks and shoes. These two men were showing us the full monty in plain view of our daughter. We were immediately reminded of what day it was. It was the day of the World Naked Bike Ride. Problem was, besides trying to distract our daughter from looking out the window, the ride hadn’t even begun yet. In a nutshell (pun intended) I think this is the main problem we have with this annual Portland event.

This weekend will mark the return of the World Naked Bike Ride in Portland where up to 8,000 riders will take part with participants either partially clothed or not at all. Every year there are strong voices for and against this event and on what side of the fence your argument lies depends on a lot of things; your tolerance to public nudity, your family values, where you live, how comfortable you are in a group of naked strangers and, of course, your overall hatred towards oil dependency. Wait, what was that last part?

That’s right, this isn’t just a bunch of people riding around naked through the streets of downtown Portland (or Normandale Park), this is a protest against oil dependency. Under Oregon law, the World Naked Bike Ride is perfectly legal because it is a form of protest where nudity magically becomes legal. But, wait, that’s not all. This ride is also about making us more aware of how vulnerable cyclists and pedestrians are to cars; it’s also about body image and self awareness and declaring confidence in the body. This is a pretty heavy handed ride all the sudden. Maybe too much so.

Before we deal with the nudity issue let’s talk about the protest part of this event. The problem I do have with this so-called protest, as I do some other forms of protest, is that the message seems muddled. What is this event about? Oil dependency? Body image? Cars? Bikes? Tutus and ugly socks? I suppose you can have more than one message at a protest, but at some point if you have too many messengers each with a different message than you end up with nothing more than white noise. Or, is it really a protest at all anymore? From most accounts the atmosphere at this event is more like a celebration than a mission to educate. It’s all good and well for people to have fun and to feel as free as the wind as they ride in the most uncomfortable way I can ever imagine, but at what point is saying this is a protest become almost comical. I’m sure there are those who do this event while still trying to convey the original message of protesting oil dependency, but it seems that the original message is either being diluted, replaced or completely abandoned as more and more people attend the World Naked Bike Ride. Like any other protest, many people will attend and join in just to be a part of the atmosphere and to make noise, causes be damned. I have no doubt that what started as a few hundred people and has now grown to the thousands that this is what has happed here. The World Naked Bike Ride is known for using creative body art as expression, so how about expressing some ideas and themes other than Viking helmets and capes. In an interview given last year, one of the lead organizers said she hopes the event goes back to its protest roots a little more this year with a more central theme. I hope she is successful in that mission whether it is oil dependency or body image as a theme. Give the gawkers something to think about as they stare and take pictures. Portland prides itself on being inventive and weird; maybe it’s time to put that creative weirdness to imaginative use. Riding naked by itself is no longer creative or inspired even if it is very Portland. A lot of people see the protest side of the World Naked Bike Ride as nothing more than a loophole for thousands of people to ride naked and it’s hard not to argue with that.

When it comes to nudity I don’t consider myself much of a prude. Do I want to see most people naked? No. Do I want to see you naked at a food cart ordering food while I’m taking my daughter out and about? No. But, nor do I feel my daughter would be scarred for life if she did see you sans clothes. Her dreams may be haunted for a couple weeks but I don’t think her life would be shattered. We Americans have a funny attitude towards nudity, much different than a lot of other countries for which I feel are better talking points for the World Naked Bike Ride than the whole oil thing. So, let me defend the World Naked Bike Ride on this issue for a moment. One of my favorite shows is Hannibal. In two separate episodes a guy cut his face off and fed it to dogs and the main character slashed a woman’s throat and then gutted another main character in an orgy of blood and violence. Like I said, it’s one of my favorite shows. Besides my own gasps of shock, I heard next to nothing about that show. But, if the same show were to show a bare boob than it would be the most controversial show on broadcast TV. The Janet Jackson Super Bowl fiasco was one the most overreacted to events in recent memory and as a result as steadily given us some of the most boring Super Bowl halftime shows in recent memory. And she didn’t even show a full boob! I’m not quite sure how violence is perfectly fine but nudity is a huge no-no. It all seems backwards to me. And for those parents who are worried about what their kids will see if the dare find themselves in the vicinity of the World Naked Bike Ride, chances are if you have a computer, tablet or smartphone and access to something called the internet they will see much, much worse at some point. I don’t like it any more than the next parent, but it’s the truth. That’s why I’m taking my wife and daughter off the grid as soon as possible and we are going to live in the mountains, presumably where all the naked bike riders live. That being said, we live in society where parents have every right to feel a bit queasy about letting their kids see adults in a manner usually relegated to the bedroom. You have to look no further than the 10 o’clock news to find out why. So, while I fully support the right to ride naked, can you at least wait until the actual ride to strip off your clothes? If the protest to oil and/or body image is really what this is about, than the nudity can wait until the actual event begins. No one is thinking about your cause while you are ordering a hot dog in the buff.

Since 2004 this event has grown in popularity and it figures to be its biggest yet in terms of turnout, especially since this weekend’s forecast looks very bare butt friendly. As this event grows I hope it evolves into something more. To those who oppose it it’s not going away any time soon, nor should it. It looks well organized for the most part, the problems are seemingly nothing more than what you would find on a marathon route and the event itself is now a Portland staple. I just wish it had a clearer message. With more and more people participating in the World Naked Bike Ride, whatever message they do decide to declare will be heard loud and clear.