Around the NFL: 07/08/11

Around the NFL is a weekly feature on Foxboro Blog offering an irreverent (and sometimes humorous) look at some of the top news stories from the NFL. Read at your own risk!

• The Eighth Circuit Court ruled that the lockout was legal today. While the court’s decision is unpopular, I still don’t think that ruling will be the most maligned legal decision in the news this week. They may want to send Nancy Grace a fruit basket for covering their ass.
• Cowboys WR Roy Williams recently sued former Miss Texas Brooke Daniels for the return of a $76,000 engagement ring after the beauty queen turned down his videotaped marriage proposal (nothing says romance like a marriage proposal mailed through the U.S. Postal Service, right?). The producers of The Real Housewives of Tarrant County must be scrambling for a replacement as we speak. It’s hard to blame Roy for wanting the ring back; it’s not like he’ll ever win one.
• Eagles offensive coordinator Marty Mornhinweg said this week that Mike Vick could be better than Steve Young. After watching Donovan McNabb for so many years, I’d imagine every other quarterback on the roster looks like Steve Young.
• In other Cowboys news (it’s a slow news week, even by July lockout standards), the team reached an agreement this week on a joint marketing deal with Marvel Comics. The agreement also requires Magneto to assassinate DeMaurice Smith if the player reps don’t cave to the owners’ financial demands next week.
• Former Titans, Raiders, Giants, Saints and Panthers QB Kerry Collins announced his retirement this week after 16 milquetoast years in the NFL. Can’t say I blame him. If my current employer only wanted to pay me $3 million to hold a clipboard for the next six months and occasionally help train my replacement, I’d give them a polite “thanks, but not thanks” too.
• A pair of sources are reporting that former Patriots LB Mike Vrabel may join the Ohio State coaching staff. It’s not a done deal yet, so Buckeye players might want to hold off on getting their “Coach Vrabel” tattoos, no matter how cheaply they can get their ink done.