With the season fast approaching already upon us BMR will be rolling out our obligatory season previews division-by-division over the coming week. Today, we’ll be taking a look at the Pacific division.
We’re still running through our season previews, which may have now turned into postview preview views since the season has already started. Nonetheless, we will preview the postview of the current view that we have of each division. Don’t even try to follow the logic, it’s too complex for even us.
Today, we’re taking a look at the Pacific Division. It’s home to the Sharks who have won it three years in a row and look poised to do it again, no matter which view you’re looking through. To help with the process we’ve yet again chained Pierre McGuire and Mike Milbury to a desk in the hopes that they can give us some serious insight into the division.
PM: Well, we’ve been here in the BMR blog vortex of space and time for nearly 8 days now, are surviving by drinking our own urine and rationing a box of Reese’s Puffs. They say once we talk about the Pacific division they’ll let us leave but at this point, we can’t be certain.
MM: On Day 4, I thought the worst part of this would be having to talk to you all the time, Petey. But now that the Reese’s Puffs are stale, it’s a living hell. Have you tried these things? They’re awful.
PM: I… I can’t believe you’d say that about me Mike. I’m flattered.
MM: Don’t get used to it four eyes.
PM: I won’t. Let’s get this going. First up are the Sharks. They just made Joe Thornton captain and are coming off yet another playoff failure. Do they win the division for a fourth year in a row? I don’t see why not. Do they implode in the post-season again, Mike?
MM: Joe THAWton! He’s a BAWSTON guy. What a loser. Couldn’t captain the BROOOINS. No way he’s going to captain the epic fail that is the SHAWKS.
PM: It’s no guarantee, that’s for sure. Let’s face it this team has some serious questions in goal now that Nabokov is gone. Moving on, we’ve got the Kings. The Kings are coming off a stellar season that finally saw all their young talent come to fruition including Drew Doughty, who has established himself as one of the best defenders in the league.
MM: Remember when I traded Ziggy Palffy to the Kings? Ha!
PM: What does that have to do with this?
MM: Nothing but you should have seen the look on the faces of all those dumb Islander fans when I pulled the trigger on that. BAHAHA
PM: Moving on… I feel like I say that a lot around here.
MM: And so does your Mom.
PM: That’s below the belt, Mike.
MM: Yeah? What you gonna do about it? WHAT YOU GONNA DO PUNK?!
PM: Sigh. How about the Coyotes, Mike? Can they repeat the unbelievable season they had in 09-10?
MM: You know, they’re offering lower bowl seating for as little as $25 for their season opener? How in the world can you stay in business by doing that? They’ll be in Winnipeg this time next year.
PM: But on the ice, are they going to be good?
MM: Who cares.
PM:…. Uh… The folks reading this preview.
MM: Always a smart ass, huh?
PM: Mike, come on. I just want to get out of here, go home and see my family.
MM: That’s fair enough. You’re still a smart ass though.
PM: I can live with that.
MM: What team is next?
PM: Dallas.
MM: *laughs*
PM: What’s so funny?
MM: The Stars’ chances this year.
PM: And there you have it folks! The Pacific division.
*voice from above * NO. NO. YOU’RE FORGETTING THE DUCKS.
PM: Ugh. Alright, Mike. The Ducks. They finally re-signed Bobby Ryan to a 5-year deal. No more JS Giguere, Jonas Hiller is the man for sure. Teemu is back for another go-around. What do you think?
MM: You remember in the movie when the girl was the best player on the team?
PM: Yes, Connie.
MM: Yeah, that’s what they’re going to need to make a run in this division this year.
PM: Connie from the Mighty Ducks?
MM: Yeah. You heard it here first.
PM: Interesting… And with that we’re done! Thank you Sweet Baby Jesus!
*voice from above* VERY WELL. YOU CAN GO.
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