Vikings Find Replacement for Adrian Peterson

andy

Look at that man. Amazing! Frightening! A total stud, with or without his shirt off! And there are very few people who you can actually say that about. I mean, his nickname is Purple Jesus for Dad's sake. HE'S NICKNAMED AFTER JESUS, or is actually Jesus reincarnate, we haven't really separated the two ideas yet, even after #28's amazing NFL career thus far.

So why are we talking about replacing him already? Well, we found someone faster than Adrian Peterson at Vikings training camp this year:

//platform.vine.co/static/scripts/embed.js

DEAR GOD, THAT AMAZING SPEED!

What you don't know is that this video (A "Vine" as all the kids I probably hate call it) is actually being replayed at one quarter the actual speed of when it happened. Meaning? Not only did this LITTLE GIRL absolutely demolish Adrian Peterson in a foot race, but she did it handily, and with style. Not even breaking a sweat. And while wearing a wind breaker, which totally must have been slowing her down.

Point being, hey, I love Peterson probably more than the next man. I mean, we named a Minnesota Vikings blog after him, yes? But I will be the first person to acknowledge that this dude that just ran for over 2,000 yards is likely not going to live forever (conjecture, 100% on my part, but just roll with me), and so we will need to find a replacement running back for this team eventually. So let's look! Would this new player be found on the current roster? Toby Gerhart? Ha. Uhh … Likely not. So I'd guess off the team, maybe in the current college or high school ranks, just perfecting their craft and waiting to become a Minnesota Vikings.

OR, THE REPLACEMENT RUNNING BACK IS THIS LITTLE GIRL READY TO BREAK FOOTBALL'S GENDER BARRIER AND BECOME THE GREATEST RUNNING BACK EVER! The team should sign her to a future's contract right now. Or whenever she's finished with her juice box.

Arrow to top