“Teddy Two Minutes” Isn’t Actually a Great Nickname

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Whether it’s GUMP, Touchdown Teddy, or “Franchise Savior”, the new Minnesota Vikings quarterback has plenty of nicknames. Apparently when you’re a exciting, young, and strongly performing player, everyone wants to come up with a catchy name for you. Include Cordarrelle Patterson. Except … Except for when he calls you “Teddy Two Minutes.”

On one hand, “Teddy Two Minutes” kind of makes sense for a nickname. Teddy Bridgewater soiled every Vikings fans’ pants last Saturday when he led the Vikings seventh string offense down the field against the Cardinals 18th string defense for a game winning touchdown. Now, the fact that it came with more like a minute left on the clock, rather than two, is inconsequential. Teddy was still running what’s called the “Two Minute Offense”, which manages the game clock and works to move the ball down the field quickly to get into scoring position. Since he pulled this offense off to perfection, Cordarrelle decided this is now Teddy’s “thing” … He’s “Teddy Two Minutes.” He can do anything in two minutes! And that’s kind of the problem.

I’d hate to be premature here and say Teddy isn’t deserving of the nickname; I’m not saying that. I’m just saying we can’t thrust all these expectations on Teddy’s shoulders too early, too ungainly. Fans are being sloppy right now, getting a bit too excited a bit too early. Teddy may just turn out to be the one pump this franchise needs to reach orgasmic feats, but we can’t know that yet. And what if he isn’t? Don’t you think he’ll feel embarrassed? Ashamed? You think falling short of expectations is something he’s had to live with before? That has never happened before, Teddy swears it, in all his experience … At college, in high school, wherever. And it won’t happen again, so he says, but we can’t know for sure. If it does, we’ll just have to clean up the mess and move on, just like what we are doing with Christian Ponder’s mess. All over the place, man, come on.

Point being, “Teddy Two Minutes” or not, let’s slow down on the Teddy accolades. Let’s let him perform as he knows he can, and then decide whether we can claim he’s the best we’ve ever had or not. But that’s what fans always say.

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