The Week That Were: 10.3.09

Yup, it’s the wrap up for people who don’t have ESPN but somehow have the internet.

This week’s “From things you can’t unsee” department- This thing right here.

We start our review with the end of an era. Yup, it happened- Mich1gAAn played a team with a defensive pulse and lost. Although, the MAChigan State Spartans did their best to “Sparty” it (Midwestern version of “Couging” it for our Pac 10 readers), giving away a 14 point lead in the final quarter. MSU’s second consecutive victory over “The Victors” came due to outgaining their “big brothers” 417 to 251 yards, including 197 to 28 on the ground. Here’s a video of the winning score in overtime, in case you’re teaching a clinic in tackling sometime soon:

Yeah, just do the opposite of that and your team will be fine. At least the Spartans get to go home with an ugly trophy.

Elsewheres in “teams I wish would disappear”, the “It’s Ty Willingham’s Fault” bowl also went to overtime, as Notre Ame beat Washington. A couple of weeks ago, Charlie Weis complained about the officials in their loss to TTUN. Four years ago, Domers complained about U$C’s illegal play when someone paid Reggie Bush to push Matt Leinart into the end zone. Well, it looks like the complaints … uh… prayers have been answered:

Yes, the Irish won, but there were other shenanigans as well. Several receptions were borderline traps, and the last play of the game should have been a double personal foul for leading with the helmet:

The kid was unconscious before he hit the turf… watch his arms. If this type of thing warrants league suspension (and I think it should), then certain “independent” teams should be held accountable by the NCAA. But, we all know that’s not going to happen, and now Lou Holtz gets to talk about Clausen as a Heisman candidate. Call me when they beat a team with a winning record and play someone with a defensive pulse (see 4CA, Tate).

For the record, MAChigan State, Mich1gAAn, and Notre Ame have split the series against each other. That’s a little like this, only you’d need to replace the steak with a sweaty sock that no one cares about.

Finally, in my “axe to grind” department we head to the balmy climes of South Florida for the Choklahoma match up with the Hurricanes. Granted, the Sooners didn’t have their QB (get well soon, Bradford), but that doesn’t explain managing to only go into the half up by three when the first two series Miami runs ended in interceptions. As expected, Miami won 21-20, and the uproar that “Miami’s Back!” was heard throughout Army Surplus stores across the country.

Mark May continues to call Stoops “Big Game Bob”, but I can’t for the life of me figure out the last big game he won (and no, I don’t consider trouncing an overrated Texas Tech team last year to be in this category).

Elsewhere in college football:

• Nebraska continued to cruise, crushing BYE.
• BYU moved one step closer to being “Champions of Utah”, which comes with a $.25 off Wendy’s Frosty coupon.
• Wisconsin beat Minnesota for yet another inane Big T1e1n trophy. Make up your mind- Bunyan in Michigan or Wisconsin or Minnesota… Sheesh
• Ohio State beat Indiana without any sort of officiating assistance. You know, the one that went for 400+ on Mich1gAAn? Yeah, try 228, even missing our defensive captain and with a lot of young players getting reps. Oh, and there were passes to the tight end and a TD pass to a freshman fullback- the first fullback reception since 2001. Trust me, it’s more rare than seeing Coach Mangino say “nope” at the Old Country Buffet.
• Virginia woke up to beat North Carolina. Ralph Sampson must have eligibility left.
• Nerd Bowl- Purdues’ engineers lost to Northwestern’s… uh… nerds.
• Iowa snuck by Arkansas State, and State Penn pounded Illinois (although the Illini scored, so there’s that)
• LSU beat Georgia in a game that was only worth watching during the last quarter. Oh, and SEC Speed doesn’t preclude officiating shenanigans.
• Alabama and Mississippi State reminded Kentucky and Vanderbilt that it’s not basketball season yet.
• Houston’s national title hopes went down in flames to UTEP, 58-41. It’s called defense, guys… please see my earlier comments on tackling.
• Arkansas whooped (seriously, the only way to describe it) aTm.
• U$C helped Cal continue on it’s late season slide– why wait ’till November, right?
• Stanford (I’m just as surprised as you are) continues to be atop the Pac 10, beating UCLA
• Auburn! Wow, that coach has really made a name for himself... War Tigers over the Vols.
• Both Oregon schools won, and TCU continues to be undefeated. If it matters.
• Texas, Kansas, Florida were off. Brett Favre is still unretired.
• Boise State proved they were worthy of their #5 ranking, beating UC Davis. Please be sure to read the previous with heavy doses of sarcasm.

Quick note on that- Tell me again why Cincinnati is ranked above Iowa? UC is undefeated, and hasn’t played anyone other than Oregon State (as if that were saying something). Iowa just handed Penn State their only loss, and has one more win.  Oh well, the AP polls don’t matter as long as Ohio State follows ancient wisdom.

Small schools: Westminster beat Haskell Indian Nations University 47-14.

This week, there are a number of great games to watch, starting with Nebraska at Missouri on Thursday night. Saturday’s showdowns include a battle of the top teams in the Big T1e1n, as Wisconsin comes to Columbus. Florida and LSU also square off in a “battle for the most mullets” between two top 5 programs. State Penn eats another cupcake, Sparty and the Zooks try to see who can lose first, and Georgia Tech looks for a way to get Bobby Bowden finally fired. Although, you can’t fire someone who’s undead… explains the Gators’ decisions earlier this week.

Next week- no TWTW (feel free to consult this fine resource). Your humble correspondent will be spending the better part of his weekend crossing something off his bucket list. If you’re interested, we can try to arrange something when everyone’s out in Pasadena in January, although I think the park is closed.  Otherwise, this will have to suffice: