Ruff Cries, Calls up Goon

Tonight is Game Four in the Eastern Conference Quarterfinals between the Buffalo Sabres and Boston Bruins and it could get ugly. Buffalo was already bitchy about Boychuk’s supposed “two hand” slash on Thomas Vanek, and then Boychuk broke Matt Ellis’ soul and his nose in Game 3. So the Sabres called up AHL tough guy Cody McCormick: “Because he is playing very well. He is a guy that has played 16 to 20 minutes a game down there [Portland],” Ruff said. “He is a big body that can get to the front of the net. I think he can win battles down low. Without [Jochen] Hecht, without [Thomas] Vanek, without some bigger bodies, some of the battles have gone the other way and I think a big guy that will be able to win some battles will be important for us. He is thought very highly of by Portland and if we can get 16 to 17 minutes out of him, I think he will be able to bring us a lot tonight.” Or he was tired of his team getting abused by the Destroyer of Worlds, Johnny B.

Crying teaaaaaaaaaaaaaars of a rapper.

Sabres forward and resident wuss Paul Gaustad has guaranteed a victory tonight. Shawn Thornton then showed up and Paul peed himself.

The battle between Miller and Rask has been exactly as billed. Rask holds a 2.01 goals-against average and a .936 save-percentage heading into Game 4 and Ryan Miller has earned a 2.36 goals-against average and a .929 save-percentage.

Neither team has a Capitals-like offense but both men have still been impressive. But two U’s plus two K’s = Bruins victory tonight.

Boston is killing penalties like Boychuk is killing Sabres, going a perfect 12 for 12 through the first 3 games.

Mark Recchi has a point in every game. The Bruins grandfather is better than your grandfather.

According to NHL stats machines, there have been 239 hits so far this series. They counted Boychuk’s hit on Ellis as 26 hits.

Matt Ellis is too embarassed to show his face in public tonight and Vanek is a game time decision with a bruised vagina.

Not Bruins/Sabres related but we find it hi-larious that Carey Price will get the start tonight for the Canadiens. Montreal needs to decide if they hate him or not. However, Montreal has noted that in lieu of a regular bench door they have installed a revolving door in case Price lets in one goal. If we’re all lucky, the Habs and Caps will destroy each other. Should be a great game tonight. We’re predicting a 2-1 OT victory for the Bruins. Go, go black and gold!