Nike was the preeminent athletic wear company throughout most of the 80s and 90s, latching on to Michael Jordan and riding the Bulls’ wave of championships. Lately, many other companies, like adidas and Under Armour have taken over, and the split in top companies in the field has made them less omnipresent. But Nike, through their college football outlet the Oregon Ducks, would like to remind you that in fact, they are a nuisance, and for no good reason. Let’s take a look at the Ducks and their Nike sponsored uniforms this year.
Game One: vs. Houston. Green on green, with a green helmet. Makes sense. It’s what I think of when I think of the Ducks.
Game Two: at Michigan. White on white, with a green helmet. This is the logical road uniform. Nothing to see here. Yet.
Game Three: vs. Fresno State. Black on black with a green helmet. Those sleeves kind of throw you though, don’t they?
Game Four: at Stanford. White on green, with a green helmet. So the pants are a different color. So what? Nevertheless, this is the fourth different uniform in 4 games (granted, most teams would have had two at this point.)
Game Five: vs California: Green on green with a green helmet. Hey! We’ve seen this uniform before! Sweet!
Game Six: vs Washington State. Yellow on yellow with a green helmet. Not only is this the most disgusting uniform I’ve ever seen, it’s also the Ducks 5th in a mere 6 games.
Game Seven: at Washington. White on white with a white helmet. What? They can change their HELMET too? Absurd.
Game Eight: vs USC. Yellow on yellow with a green helmet. Of the uniforms to make a repeat appearance, you went with this one? Seriously? Oregon, you’ve smoked yourself retarded. CORRECTION: It turns out the image I had up there was from a different game. The correct combo is Green on green with green helmets. I guess with three instances of this particular uniform, it’s the official uniform? CORRECTION #2: As a helpful commenter with better eyes than mine pointed out, thats black on green on green.
Game Nine: vs Arizona St. Black on yellow with a green helmet. Sure. Why not? You look like a seasick bumblebee, but might as well throw everything you’ve got together, huh?
Game Ten: at Arizona: White on black with a green helmet. Now you’re just toying with me, aren’t you? This is uniform number 9, if you’re still counting.
Game Eleven: at UCLA: White on green with a white helmet. I’m almost left with nothing to say. This is actually a decent look. Don’t expect to see it ever again.
Game Twelve: vs Oregon State: Yellow on green with an iridescent yellow helmet: What in the blue f**k is this?!
Thats 11 uniforms in 12 games. Any guesses as to what the Ducks will wear in El Paso when they play the Sun Bowl? I’d bet they go black on white with the iridescent yellow helmet. Guesses are encouraged in the comments.
Note: For Oregon fans who are linking over from Duck Sports News, thanks for your patronage. Just having a little fun with you guys. And as a Purdue fan, I can say, at least you guys aren’t going to Detroit for a bowl game and haven’t worn princess gold jerseys before. Good Luck against South Florida.
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