Photo & Article By Eric Notti – Angelswin.com Contributor
In a surprise move that has the United Nations up in arms, Tony Reagins the new General Manager of the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, has launched a surprise attack against mainland China.
Shortly after the 11 pm announcement that the Angels have agreed to contract terms with center fielder Tori Hunter, Reagins launched a massive offensive against Communist controlled China.
Tony Reagins said after completing his first free agent signing on the job, why he chose to invade China. “We continue to explore opportunities to get better.” Reagins explained, “If something presents itself that makes sense, we’re going to go after it. The deal today gives us some flexibility and an opportunity to do some other things down the road.”
Asked if that may lead to the trade for Miguel Cabrera or go after Osama Bin Ladin.
“I can’t confirm or deny.” Reagins said. “I don’t think anyone is untouchable.”
The Chinese army was caught completely by surprise as the generals where busy blogging about their days events. Before they could log off Beijing had fell to Reagins army.
“Tony is not done; he’s going to keep pushing forward,” Manager Mike Scioscia said, referring to new General Manager Tony Reagins’ attempts to take China is less than 2 hours. “Obviously, there’s a lot of focus on the offense, and now he has the tools to do the things we need to do.” said Scoscia, making reference to Arte’s willingness to fund Tony’s pursuits.
Asked about his new role as an invader and conqueror, Reagins was very upbeat.
“It’s really an honor and a privilege to play at this level and a lot of things have to go right.” Reagins said as he ordered an assault deeper into the mainland, “You have to be in the right place at the right time and you have to perform at a high level. It’s just not easy to do.”
Regardless of the outcome, Reagins has certainly made a big splash in not only the baseball world but the global community as well. Although he has not acknowledged it, the Angels have easily won the battle for off season supremacy in the nation’s second largest media market.
In related news, Ned Colletti invaded Korea Town in downtown Los Angeles this morning but his army was beaten back by two old ladies with brooms and the family pet poodle.
Tony Reagins
Angels General Manager
General of the First Expiditionary Forces in China
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