FOE FODDER: Yankees Return to Big A

This is the first installment of AngelsWin.com’s newest column; and while the goal of Foe Fodder is to bring some humor to the blog, I am not feeling my comedic best at the moment.

Maybe it’s because the Yankees are rolling into town for the first time since beating the Angels in last year’s American League Championship Series and the sting of recollection has dampened my mood.

Maybe it’s because I was recently married and just now realized I will be sharing a bank account with my wife. Accountability has never been one of my strong suits. Looks like I’ll soon be losing my “client” in Temecula. No more midweek runs to Pechanga.

Or maybe, just maybe, it’s the Yankees themselves. The Boston Red Sox have certainly replaced the Pinstripers as public enemy No. 1 in Orange County, but that doesn’t mean we have to roll out the proverbial red carpet for the Bronx Bombers. If you were curious, the answer is YES (pun absolutely intended) — I am trying to squeeze as many monikers for the Yankees as I can into this paragraph. Did you know it was Boston Red Sox President Larry Luchino who termed “The Evil Empire”? Anyhow, the Yanks are in town and there is some noteworthy fodder.

• It is 2010, Yankees … put your damn names on your jerseys. Enough with the “tradition” and “history” spiel. If you’re inclined to continue running out there void of last names in the name of tradition, then forfeit your right to wear modern materials. Wrap your bodies in wool and enjoy asking the equipment manager for a new pair of stockings. 

• Joba Chamberlain continues to be the most abused talking point of local and national play-by-play men and color commentators in all of baseball. We should all be eating sweaty Joba gristle. How could five million flies be wrong?

• Did you hear Derek Jeter retired? Yep. He was recently engaged to girlfriend, Minka Kelly. Beautiful celebrities will have to once again get herpes the old fashioned way, by using the restroom at Paris Hilton’s house. No word if all of Jeter’s exes will attend the wedding. They can always go hiking with huge smiles under a picturesque sunset, if not.

Finally, after so many complaints by readers of the blog that we are homers and wear rose-colored glasses, I vow to bring objectivity to the blog by making thoughtful, in depth predictions for each series featured in Foe Fodder.

Angels take the series, three games to zero.