You feel that? It feels nice, right? No need to clench your butthole for at least another 48 hours or so. We’ve got ourselves a best-of-3 series now, and you better believe the tides have changed. Did the Penguins win tonight’s game because that scumbag Tom Wilson didn’t play because he got suspended yet again for being a scumbag? Probably not (unless, that is, he would’ve tried to deliver a traumatic brain injury to one of the Penguins that are actually doing something this series like Jake Guentzel or Sidney Crosby). The Penguins won this game tonight because they were the better team, plain and simple. They out-shot, out-possessed, and out-scored the Caps. But don’t tell Grant Paulsen that. He’s too busy sucking T.J. Oshie’s dick for being a scumbag for trying to obliterate Letang’s head, then trying to punch him after the fact while the clock was winding down to zero.
https://twitter.com/G_Off817/status/992218516957876225
https://twitter.com/G_Off817/status/992218687892525056
It was good to see TJ Oshie land some punches in that fight with Kris Letang. Looked like he left his feet on the hit to Letang that let to the scuffle. Big hit. Then answered Letang's challenge well. #Caps
— Grant Paulsen (@granthpaulsen) May 4, 2018
Very ugly display from Timothy Jimothy. Safe to say Pensetta Puck agrees.
https://twitter.com/Pensetta/status/992219519392370689
Anddddd since I’m feeling extra lazy tonight, we’re going straight to the notes rather early.
- The Penguins came out tonight and looked good in the first minute for the first time all series. It was nice to see them not give up a goal in the first 35 seconds of play even though, they themselves, didn’t score a goal.
- Jake Guentzel is a playoff scoring machine (23 goals in 35 career playoff games). Give this kid the puck as often as possible and good things will happen.
- Evgeni Malkin put a puck past the goal line tonight that matched Grant Paulsen’s vertical jump (one inch).
Although he is looking pretty slim these days. Probably due to all those lettuce wraps he eats for appetizers (I only know this because I listened to his stupid radio show today while I stayed on hold for over an hour because I was trying to prank call him with Rich and G). 
- Crosby and Ovechkin each had zero shots on goal tonight. How many times can you say that over the past 13 years? Over/under like 20 times. Well, at least Sid made Ovi look like a complete buffoon right before he fed Jake with the empty netter.
Wow does Crosby make Ovechkin look silly here. pic.twitter.com/DlhCa8shUO
— Peep (@PeepsBurgh) May 4, 2018
- Brian Dumoulin, much like Jake Guentzel, remains a playoff monster.
How about Brian Dumoulin tonight?
17:27 at even-strength
23 shot attempts for
9 against12 scoring chances for
2 against— Jesse Marshall (@jmarshfof) May 4, 2018
- Even my 82-year old grandmother recognizes that T.J. Oshie’s a dirtball.
- Finally, like I said after Game 3, we’re still winning this series.
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And that’ll do it for Game 4. Stay tuned for the full recap in the am from Geoff (@G_Off817) per usual.
Go Pens.
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