2009 Record: 9-7
2009 Rankings:
Total Offense – 20
Run Offense – 1
Pass Offense – 31
Scoring Offense – 17
Total Defense – 1
Run Defense – 8
Pass Defense – 1
Scoring Defense – 1
The Jets spent their offseason acquiring more illegitimate children than they know what to do with. Between Antonio Cromartie (8 kids with 7 women in 6 states), Santonio Holmes (4 kids), the Jets have enough to warrant building a nursery in the New Meadowlands Stadium. Word is, Cromartie had to get a $500K advance on his salary so that he could pay his child support. Darrelle Revis finally ended his holdout for more money, because in this economy, getting paid $1 million to stop people from catching a ball isn’t nearly enough. In fact, according to the deal Revis got, it’s worth about $8 million per year, or more than twice entire municipal budget of the Borough of Crafton.
To make matters better, the Jets have been featured on HBO’s Hard Knocks this year, and in case you didn’t know it before, Rex Ryan likes to swear.
On the football side of things, Mark Sanchez is due to take the traditional step-back that rookie quarterbacks who have a good rookie season usually have. The Jets picked up LaDainian Tomlinson from the local AARP meeting with the hope that he can add a new dynamic to their running game. Shonn Greene was one of our favorite college backs in recent years and he’s going to be a monster for the Jets this season. However, in this division, there is going to come a time when they need to throw to win. Can Sanchez do it? Braylon Edwards can’t catch the ball and Santonio Holmes is suspended for the first 4 weeks of the year.
On defense, the Jets will be very, very good once again. Rex Ryan is going to blitz, blitz, blitz, and blitz some more. Then when they’re done with that they’re going to blitz again. There is enough talent in the secondary, even with the loss of free safety Kerry Rhodes, to hold down the coverage. Rhodes will be replaced by former Cleveland Brown Brodney Pool. There’s a joke in there somewhere, we’re too lazy to find it. Oh wait, he played for Cleveland. This team is good enough to challenge for the division crown, but they’re going to lose if any team can get them into a shootout.
Ian’s Prediction: 10-6
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