Jamie Moyer Is So Old…

Jamie Moyer Is So Old...


If you hadn’t already heard, Jamie Moyer turned 50 on Sunday and, naturally, the internets were a buzz with some fun facts about the lefty. 

For example, should Moyer make an appearance in 2013, he’d join Satchel Paige and Jack Quinn as the only pitchers to ever appear in the bigs after their 50th birthday. And since Quinn’s last appearance was just six days after he turned 50…Moyer trails only Paige in terms of the oldest pitchers ever.

Pretty cool.

So to celebrate the pitcher’s 50th birthday, Lou Olsen (the cat behind the always awesome John Axford Mustache Facts over at Reviewing the Brew) uncovered some unknown facts about baseball’s favorite octogenarian.

 
Jamie Moyer is so old that if he doesn’t drink enough water, his muscles turn to jerky.

Jamie Moyer is so old that he didn’t play The Oregon Trail, he was the inspiration.

Jamie Moyer is so old that his cemetery plot has been on layaway since the Great Depression.

Jamie Moyer is so old that he told Hamlet as a campfire story.

Jamie Moyer is so old that he still winds his clocks.

Jamie Moyer is so old that the plastic covering his furniture…has plastic on it. 

Jamie Moyer is so old that Honus Wagner called him “Pops”

Jamie Moyer is so old that he remembers when burning witches was America’s pasttime.

Jamie Moyer is so old that he haunts ghosts, not the other way around.

Jamie Moyer is so old that when he signed his first contract, he sealed the envelope with candle wax and his family crest stamp.

Jamie Moyer is so old that the first film George Burns wanted to make was his biopic.

Jamie Moyer is so old that his first smart phone had a rotary dial. 

Jamie Moyer is so old that even the Yankees don’t want him.

All kidding aside, the world is probably a better place for having a guy like Jamie Moyer around for as long as he has been.  His Moyer Foundation has been a pretty good friend of The Hall of Very Good for a few years so it’s probably time to remind you that you can follow them on Twitter at @moyerfoundation.

Also, to learn more about the foundation or make a donation to support one of their programs, please visit them online at The Moyer Foundation.

Jamie Moyer Is So Old...

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