A Decade of Sausage

With the signing of Jim Kleinsausage to a 3 year deal recently, that means that the husky North Dakotan grad will continue his 10 year NFL career with the Vikings, after he was taken in the 1999 draft. With Matt Birk increasing his chances of getting murdered by moving to Baltimore, that apparently means that Sausage is the longest tenured Viking now. How long? Well, here are some things that have happened during his time in Minnesota:

– Brett Farve had just started discussing his retirement
– Mike Tice was considered a viable replacement as a head coach
– Barry Bonds was innocently still hammering away homeruns
– You just discovered your penis
– DMX was still making albums
– You were counting down the years until you could masturbate to the Olsen twins guilt free
– MTV occasionally still played music videos on their television station
– The housing market was on the up-swing
– Britney Spears has gone from tingling genital relevance to a vomit inducing downfall
– Dikembe Mutumbo had his 46th birthday when Sausage was drafted
– Michael Jordan retired for the 4th time
– OJ Simpson is still looking for who killed Nicole Brown
– The year Sausage was drafted was also the last good year of new Simpsons episodes
– They also started adding pupils to the Madden Football digital players, effectively ending the zombie football player era
– Compact Discs were still relevant and exciting
– Jesus was resurrected as an amazing, purple, football player

This of course just scratches the surface, as there were many other things that occurred during Sausage’s time with the team. Perhaps in another ten years we can look back and enjoy another decade of remarkable events!