An Emotional Recap…Stats Are For Losers

Here is the recap of the 2006 season as seen through my eyes. Keep in mind no stats will be used and also no animals were harmed in the course of these events.

• Georgia Tech… The game is finally here. I can’t stand a season opener on prime time. Two years in a row we have all had to endure this unholy torture. I called into work and let them know I wasn’t feeling all that well and would not be coming in that night. What ends up happening was not too far from the truth. As proud as I was of the defense, doubts about our team arose in my mind about our offense. Satan went ice skating and I slapped myself in the face for clarity. None of it really mattered- we won and now we go home to make Joe Pa crap his pants for the first time this season.
• Penn State… This one was a weird one for me. First off, if I wanted to go to the game I had tickets. But God himself proclaimed that I must not at at any circumstances be there. My cousin was getting married that day to what I thought was a HUGE Irish fan when it turns out, he might be a poser. Could I skip the wedding? No, I am a groomsman. But in a shitty turn of events that ended up being magical, I saw the game from start to finish under the supervision of the state of Ohio. I was in Jail. Arrested and detained on a probation violation of which I was unaware. (the bastard got me during my fantasy draft) But a weekend in jail could not dampen the utter joy of an ass-whooping.(by ND jerky) I was out on Sunday And ND was #2.
• Skunkbears… Nothing good came from this game. It was a total nightmare. I didn’t know you could lose the Heisman during the third game of the year, but Quinn managed to do just that. He had lots of help including a porous secondary, dropped balls, tipped balls, playing with no balls, etc., etc. I found out something about myself that day. I learned that the Davieham era has preconditioned me to a blowout loss and I found myself just sitting there, taking it like a man. I barely had the stomach for the 2nd half… but I marched on, knowing there were better days to come. I believe this game was the most talked about during the season. Every week someone mentioned it. Screw you Mark May.