An Open Letter to Sidney Crosby

An open letter to Sidney Crosby

My dear Sidney Crosby, you seem a bit stressed out as of late. Now, I know that since you are the captain of a closely watched team, and you have the Reebok deals and such. It’s understandable for you to be stressed out. I see it in your face–you’re giving us the “grrr, I’m so angry and/or constipated” look more often.And then, there’s the whole junk punching thing. Sid, (I won’t insult you by calling you “the kid” since we’re the same age) even the busiest of us need to take a little self-love time. I think I can offer you some advice on ways to relax.

You should have some sort of release for anger that doesn’t involve punching other dudes in the junk. Now, everyone has different ways of release. Maybe for you it could be crocheting, yoga, or playing Smash Brothers Brawl and seeing how many times you can make Princess Peach jump off the stage in two minutes (my personal record is 27). Or maybe you need to draw a bubble bath,light some candles, and put on some Enya. You can even do it in the full uniform, if you like, which is a great image, by the way. Whatever works for you, as long as it doesn’t involved punching other dudes in the swimsuit area, works.

hugs and kisses,

Loser Domi