The NHL may be showcasing its best and brightest at this weekend’s All Star game but hockey isn’t the only sport set to make headlines on Sunday. WWE will hold the Royal Rumble on Sunday. One of their most popular annual pay per view events, the Rumble officially starts the Road to Wrestlemania. If you’re not familiar with the finesr aspects of pro wrestling, we’ll explain.
The Royal Rumble match is a variation on a battle royal which sees 30 wrestlers fight to eliminate their competition by throwing them over the top rope. It starts with two men and a new competitor enters every 90 seconds. The last man standing wins the opportunity to compete for the WWE championship on the grandest show of them all, Wrestlemania. It’s a wild, exciting affair usually chock full of surprise entrants and insane moments. With the league on hiatus for a few days we started pondering a question.
If the Lightning were to hold a Tampa Royal Rumble who would be the last Bolt standing?
–Victor Hedman and Anton Stralman would start us out at the number one and two spots. The defensive partners may be hesitant to throw hands but it is every man for himself. Stralman would let Hedman eliminate him since he’s used to making everyone around him look good with little personal acclaim.
–Ben Bishop‘s music hits and he heads purposefully to the ring. He rolls his ankle on the way down the ramp and has to be stretchered off.
– Jonathan Drouin‘s offensive heroics have earned him the Kofi Kingston memorial spot in the Rumble. While Kofi’s never won the match he’s had some amazing tricks up his sleeve to avoid elimination:
https://youtu.be/F9i2Dptoaeg
–Slater Koekkoek would be cast as Sami Zayn. Both are underdogs who may not be picked to win the match but are secretly some of the most talented guys on the team. Here’s hoping neither run into Braun Strowman.
–Steven Stamkos would play the role of Finn Balor. They’re both brilliant athletes and some of the best at what they do. Unfortunately both of them are often injured at the worst times.
-The Triplets have long been cast as The Shield. Ondrej Palat and Tyler Johnson can remain as Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins respectively. Cedric Paquette can make a suprirse cameo as the Lunatic Frige Dean Ambrose. None of them will win. We just really want to see a triple power bomb spot.
– The rash of Syracuse Call ups like Tanner Richard, Adam Erne, Yanni Gourde, Joel Vermin, and Matthew Peca would either be the Spirit Squad or random NXT entrants.
–Erik Condra‘s rapid recalls and reassignments have earned him the Santino Marella fastest elimination spot:
–Nikita Kucherov would be none other than the Phenomenal AJ Styles. Styles has been one of WWE’s consistently best performers since making his debut at last year’s Rumble. He can do things no one else can do. Sounds like the Russian Assassin to us.
-The match would likely come down to Brian Boyle and Victor Hedman. They’ve both had great years. Unfortunately for them Steve Yzerman would pull a Triple H and eliminate them both to win the match after showing up as a surprise entrant.
There you have it. Art imitates life and The Authority reigns supreme!
(Photoshops/Tarra Dunlop and Getty Images)
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