Bumping Into Each Other

In honor of Halloween, the NFL provided some spooooooky matchups for the Minneapolis market, and by spooooooky, of course, I mean terrible. So, ducking in between some 15 year old trick or treaters, I’ll try to give you all the recap.

I decided to go visit my grandmother (who has the same shoulder strength as Brad Radke, at this point), and frankly, she’s the type who is only happy if I’m happy, so she insisted I change the channel from Public Access – Brooklyn Center. Besides, she said after I flipped it to the Cardinals/Packers game, she got a kick about the guys when they bumped into each other. Her words. She said this after a couple Cardinals chest bumped after stuffing Ahman Green. That’s really all I have to say about this game.

As I said, I wasn’t really focused on the early games, so I asked Steve what he thought about Baltimore versus New Orleans. “I was starting to think the Saints were the surprise team of the year and the Ravens were on a decline after starting well”. Also, my aunt was correct. The gold pants wearing team lost. That’s all I have.

I finally got to see the Colts and was impressed, to say the least. They fell into the trap of having fast ends, thereby allowing Plummer to operate thoughtlessly, and they have no middle to their defense so the Bells ran all over them. But being devoid of a run defense won’t be a real problem, will it? It’s not like the bulk of elite teams have good ground games. (Sarcasm, in case my tone didn’t translate digitally). But really, Peyton Manning is pretty good. He and his rocket arm picked the Broncos (who are perhaps the best defensive team in the AFC) apart. From what I have seen, with that offense they have nothing to worry about come playoff time, except, of course, their history.

The difference between the Cowboys versus the Panthers and, say, the Cardinals/Packers was that this game was on during prime time, and John Madden mangled his cliches. I can’t even figure out the difference between the two teams. They both have subpar quarterbacks, mouthy receivers fifteen running backs or so and good defenses. Even their coaches look alike. I’m sure Madden had a pearl that let us know what exactly led to the Panthers thoroughly trouncing the Cowboys.

Ah the Vikings. If nothing else, they proved me right. Brad Johnson is a miserable quarterback. When faced with real competition, he’s trouble. The Patriots gameplanned the Vikings brilliantly, taking away short passes and run blitzing. On offense, they did the little things, like realize the ends aren’t very good and E.J. Henderson is a starter. Truly, however, the game was handed to the Pats by the excessive turnovers by Minnesota. In other news, I don’t have any opinion on Brad Childress yet. He hasn’t really done anything outlandishly stupid or anything particularly intelligent (even by Vikings standards). The one thing I noticed though, is that he wanted a quarterback with working limbs, like Brad Johnson over DAunte Culpepper. However, his second draft pick was a mobile quarterback, Tavaris Jackson, so I assume he knows Brad Johnson is bad. But trust me, Johnson will be revered for the 8-8 record he will put up this year, much like Jackson will be derided for his six losses in his first 10-6 season. I hate Minnesota sportswriters.

One last note. On this Halloween evening, be sure to pay your excorsist, otherwise you may get repossessed. – Ryan