In a survey that consisted of me Google image searching all of the coaches in our conference, Chad Morris was named the second handsomest coach in the AAC.
My cousin Ray and I agree that SMU’s Chad Morris resembles Daniel Craig. More specifically, I think that Chad Morris resembles Daniel Craig if Craig were asked to portray Coach Taylor from Friday Night Lights. Now that Kyle Chandler has that new show going on Netflix, I think that Daniel Craig should quit it with the James Bond nonsense and try out for the role of Mr. Tammy Taylor in the hopefully inevitable non-Billy Bob Thornton Friday Night Lights film.
The Dixified Daniel Craig figure that Morris cuts is bested by only one coach in the American Athletic Conference. Tall, dark, and handsome Bob Diaco of the University of Connecticut wins top honors for Mr. AAC 2015. Diaco combines North Jersey swagger with the unapproachable dreaminess of Jake Ryan from Sixteen Candles.
Finishing off the medal stand for Mr. AAC 2015 is USF’s Willie Taggart, who has a million dollar smile that makes million dollar smiles blush. If a head coach’s handsomeness can turn a program around, then expect Taggart and the USF Bulls to join Chad Morris and the SMU Mustangs in the AAC title game this December.
There will never be a handsomer medal stand than the one on which Bob Diaco, Chad Morris, and Willie Taggart will accept their Mr. AAC All-Handsome Awards for 2015. The All-Handsome awards dinner will be held at Milo Butterfingers during AAC Championship Game Week. It will be a convenient place to hold the dinner, since the whole conference’s attention will be turned to Dallas for the SMU-USF title bout.
My All-Handsome Head Coach AAC Second Team consists of Houston’s Tom Herman, Cincinnati’s Tommy Tuberville, and UCF’s George O’Leary. They will also be invited to the platform to accept their awards at the December dinner. And they will receive a complimentary plate of Fiesta Nachos.
Houston’s Tom Herman made the second team for the Heath Shuleresque visage he cuts and the Jason Stathamesque way in which he carries himself.
Cincinnati’s Tommy Tuberville, a three-time All-Handsome SEC First Team selection, has matured into a salt and pepper Roy Orbison doppelganger.
UCF’s George O’Leary, the pride of Central Islip, New York, reminds me of George Kennedy. Neither of these Georges seems to age. O’Leary looked no different when he coached Georgia Tech than he does now. Similarly, George Kennedy did not age between his tenure on a Louisiana chain gang in Cool Hand Luke and his time on the Police Squad in the Naked Gun films.
The rest of the coaches in the AAC have been named to the All-Handsome 2015 Merit Roll. They all get a small participation trophy and an autographed picture of Bob Diaco.
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