Cleveland Browns: Head Coaches Dropping like Flies

If the Cleveland Browns’ big bad “three stooged” brass has a plan, it sure has yet to surface. The remaining candidates seem to be fleeing as far from Cleveland as possible. With only 32 NFL head coaching positions on the entire globe, it seems like no one wants to coach the once proud franchise. Paul Brown is probably turning over in his grave right now. Could you blame him?

The latest coaching candidate the Browns seemed high on, Ken Whisenhunt, has fled to the Tennessee Titans. Let that sink in for second, the Titans led by Jake Locker. The Titans, who was formally the hated AFC Central Division rivals, Houston Oilers. The Tennessee Titans – from a state where owner Jimmy Haslam and his family are from. What a disgrace!

So let’s run down exactly what has happened to the Browns’ search for their seventh head coach since their return in 1999. Cleveland was once high on former Penn State Nittany Lions coach, Bill O’ Brien. He elected to sign with the Houston Texans. New England Patriots coordinator and Ohio native, Josh McDaniels decided staying a Patriot assistant was a better choice than being the head honcho in Cleveland. Adam Gase, Denver Broncos offensive coordinator, has refused to talk with any team till after the playoffs.  That could be awhile if Peyton Manning and the Broncos are playing in Super Bowl XLVIII.

The Browns seem to be following suit of every other team in need and now have Mike Munchak on their radar. However, the Detroit Lions will most likely sway the former offensive lineman. It truly seems as no one wants to head coach the Browns. Jim Caldwell looks to be a front-runner for the Minnesota Vikings vacancy. This is sad.

This situation reminds me of Michael Bay’s hit movie, Armageddon. Harry Stamper (played by Bruce Willis) is talking to Dan Truman (played by Billy Bob Thornton) about the situation they’re facing and options. Truman says,

“No, we don’t have a back up plan. This is it.”  

Stamper responds,

“And this is the best that you c – that the-the government, the U.S. government can come up with? I mean, you-you’re NASA for cryin’ out loud, you put a man on the moon, you’re geniuses! You-you’re the guys that think this s*** up! I’m sure you got a team of men sitting around somewhere right now just thinking s*** up and somebody backing them up! You’re telling me you don’t have a backup plan, that these eight boy scouts right here, that is the world’s hope, that’s what you’re telling me?

My translation:

You’re the Cleveland Browns, one of the most historic franchises in all of sports. You have a tradition like no other and have 16 players in Canton. You mean to tell me that Josh McDaniels was your big plan to solve everything and stop the bleeding? Now, you’re telling me that you don’t have a back up plan and you’re frantically running around trying to find someone you didn’t even consider beforehand? You’re telling me that the hope of the Cleveland Browns fan base relies on you three stooges?

Do you see the correlation?

While all other teams are preparing for an NFL draft that arrives in 114 days, the Browns focus the majority of their efforts on searching for another next head coach. That is just one all but minor thing wrong with this situation. If and when the Browns bring in either Gase, Dan Quinn, Todd Bowles, or some other former assistant coach, it could be like Pat Shurmur all over again? Bottom line – Rob Chudzinski should still be the head coach of the Cleveland Browns.

Ryan Ruiz is the Cleveland Browns Beat Writer for The Inscriber: Digital Magazine. You can follow him on Facebook: Ryan (BrownsWriter) Ruiz and Twitter @ryanpruiz24. Ryan is also a Browns correspondent for The Sportsfix. Tune in every Friday at noon on www.thesportsfix.net. Have a question or comment for the “ASK Ryan” column on Fridays? Email Ryan at [email protected]