Welcome to the Extra P_int where the beer is always cold, the patrons less informed, and the conversation compelling.
I’ve never been a stoic, but this Monday I had the winter grumps activated by a good article gone to hell because of one human being’s fickleness. Keep in mind this is early afternoon and the day ain’t over, but it certainly appears that Chip Kelly is staying at Oregon and that’s the fickle part. It was the absolutely perfect time for him to move on to the greener fields of the NFL.
Add up the reasons.
Thanks to the incessant media hype surrounding Tim Tebow and the modest success of Denver’s weak attempt to run some option in their offense, Kelly had to be thinking the time is right to bring the full brunt of the option nose to nose with NFL defenses. If he doesn’t do it now, then someone else will and grab the title of “innovator.”
The reality of that idea is that Tampa Bay doesn’t have the personnel to run (or waddle) through the option, but why dwell in reality?
Anyway, that was running through my mind as I settled into my reserved bar stool in the Extra P_int. Dennis McDonnell settled a Mirror Pond on a Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives coaster left over from anti BCS party, a four hour 3-D marathon loaded with more trans-fat and carbs than anyone should ever watch, let alone eat.
“You hear about Kelly?” Dennis asked, drying his hands on the towel at his belt. “He’s leaving Oregon.”
“That is so thirty minutes ago,” I shot back, not making an effort to hide my pique. “How come you don’t know? This is a sports bar.”
“I can’t watch this crap all day. ESPN! It’s like they own sports.”
“Yeah, but you’d know Kelly changed his mind.”
“He’s staying?” Dennis yelled, almost as pissed as I felt. “I had the perfect bye-bye Chip idea. I’d invite Chris Peterson and rent the DVD’s of the BCS ranking shows. He’d do the commentary. He’d be in town. The Ducks would call him if Kelly left.” Dennis leaned over the well drinks and said, “Peterson’s got to have his bags packed with Kellen Moore leaving. It would be the perfect chance for him to do a little self-promoting. A little of that ‘If I was at Oregon . . . blah blah blah.’”
I told him why I thought Kelly should leave. We decided to make a list. We couldn’t decide if Peterson being a good fit should be on the list or not. It didn’t matter. Kelly wasn’t leaving.
“The Ducks are flirting with a suspension,” Dennis said, getting back to the list. “He could do a Pete Carroll and hide out in the NFL.”
We agreed that was number three or four.
“Do you think NFL players would play at Kelly’s pace?” Dennis asked. “There kinda old and fat. Some of those guys are old enough to have kids in Kelly’s program. It would be fun to watch, though.”
“That NFL two minute play clock is a real snooze,” I said.
“So how come you think he stayed?”
“He’ll say things like unfinished business, and the usual Chip Kelly empty stuff. Like ‘I just want to help the team and, with the good Lord willing, I can.’ That kind of stuff.”
“But what do you really think?”
“I think it’s tough to find a better job. He’s got big bucks to work with and a generous benefactor. Some people say Oregon can’t sustain the recruiting, but I disagree. Oregon’s got great facilities, lots of TV time, and a good track record for sending guys to the pros.”
Dennis poured beer for two customers at the other end of the bar. When he got back, he said, “I thought Chip would leave because he’s losing his big guns.”
I shook my head. “Remember the Colorado game? Both James and Thomas were hurt, but the Ducks didn’t miss a stroke. De’Anthony Thomas and the Bennett kid played great. An Oregon fan told me before that game to watch close. The new guys would be better than the starters. Maybe they are.”
Dennis and I chatted long enough to get over our disappointment with Kelly staying. I got over it with this, so it wasn’t like a good column gone to waste.
Stay tuned for more happenings in the Extra P_int where the beer is always cold, the patrons less informed, and the conversation compelling.
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