The fighting Bill Belichicks got their heads handed to them by the Kansas City Chiefs on Monday Night Football However, we won’t bury the Patriots until the janitors have finished cleaning up the stadium and the lights are turned off. It is mainly due to the presence of one Tom Brady. He plays quarterback for the Patriots. In fact, such is the skill level of Mr. Brady that I will leave reserve my final thoughts on New England until the very moment they are eliminated from the playoffs.
Interestingly enough it’s Jimmy Garappolo at mop up time and one silly reporter asked Big Bill if there was cause to do some evaluation at the quarterback position … Belichick whipped out his Hello Kitty smart phone and fired of a jaunty “LMAO” in the direction of the miscreant.
No he didn’t. What is the proper term for a single devastatingly derisive chuckle? A chuck? In any case I could hear the inert form of the offending scribe hitting the floor, stunned motionless by the depth and breadth of the sarcasm and disdain contained in the coach’s response.
Belichick’s pressers are gold, Jerry, gold. When Bill deigns to answer listen closely for any actual answer. Here are some nuggets from last night.
Indescribably stupid and unworthy reporter (ISUR): Coach why do you think this game got so far out of hand?
Bill Belichick, know-er of all things (BBKAT): Um, We didn’t play well at all and they did. That’s a bad combination for us.
Analysis … not sure how to represent a stunned silence in written form.
ISUR: Coach why did you make tactical move A as opposed to move B?
BBKAT: We were trying to win.
Analysis: Belichick said this three times in row to three different questions. There can be no analysis.
I will NEVER miss another Belichick press conference. My beautiful fiancée laughed until she cried at the standup routine Bill put on. I didn’t have the heart to tell her he was serious.
…And the other 30 teams played too!
The NFL is a Bizzaro World version of itself as the first quarter the 2014 season comes to an end tonight. As evidence to such an assertion I offer the evidence:
The Cincinnati Bengals are undefeated … and so are the Arizona Cardinals. OK the Bengals have beaten the Titans and the Falcons who are nobody’s world champs, however they opened the season with a win over the Baltimore Ravens who are 3 and 1. Not exactly the murderers’ row of the NFL but not bad. The Cardinals however have beaten a group of teams that are winning a lot of football games. The Chargers took down the Seahawks, then the 49ers who aren’t bad (or are they?) In any case ‘Frisco handed the Eagles their first loss after all. The win in the middle was the Giants who while still a riddle have proven they are not yet ready to slip quietly into the night.
The Cowboys are 3 and 1 and look vastly improved. I hate to mention the same squad two weeks in a row but …
Who are the Steelers, who are the Buccaneers? (Mike Glennon looked cool, even icy on that last throw … just saying.)
Kyle Orton is coming out of the retirement that wasn’t (Thanks Mr. Jones! Kaching!) to lead the Bills who have looked bad under the guidance of first round draft pick EJ Manuel.
… Also it’s weird that the Raiders are so bad, I mean usually … oh wait that’s not odd at all. In fact head coach Dennis Allen was let go after the 0-4 start and the 8 and 28 overall record.
Following up on the mess that is the silver and black … I do believe the age of the wunderkind coach is over… Lane Kiffin and Josh McDaniel firings started the exodus and with Allen being shown the door Monday … well let’s just say the era of trying to look innovative and smarter than everyone else with a coach who just got the vote is about as popular as a Sean Peyton fake punt, yikes.
Oakland, are you listening? Hire Jon Gruden. Offer him many American dollars and control of all things. Does the statement need simplifying?
So what does it all mean to those of us here in the beautiful Pacific Northwest?
Easy, the Seahawks are the best team in football.
On to the world of the student athlete.
The Beavers lost to USC and frankly the had it coming. The Oregon State offense stayed in the locker room most of the game or so it would seem. It’s too bad because the Beaver defense was putting up a respectable showing against the number 18 Trojans. Sean Mannion, who this writer loves in the big picture for the record, only threw for 123 yards and the running game was similarly shackled. Thus the defense, gallant though they were, just plain wore out form to many snaps.
On a single bright note, senior safety Ryan Murphy had been in head coach Mike Riley’s hip pocket all week about some kick return duty. Lo’ and behold upon the next kick there appeared in the southern sky a single beautiful 97 yard return for a touchdown and an angel appeared to the people and said … Nope way too early for super cheesy Christmas references, sorry.
Note to all Duck fans: The U of O didn’t play this week. Please wait until next Tuesday before engaging in the weekly indignation over the fact that the Ducks are not yet ranked #1.
Man that high flying Alabama passing offense sure is fun to watch. Wait what???
Western Oregon’s Ryan Bergman threw for 339 yards in this weekend loss to Humboldt State bringing the senior quarterback to 1,236 on the year. This puts Bergman at the top of the statistical heap in division 1 and 2 here in Oregon. The comparison is an apples to oranges affair but good football is good football.
A name for you college recruiters. Wes Riddle. Riddle, number 32, on your program is the tailback for the Central Panthers and in four games has piled up 1,188 yards from scrimmage and is averaging 297 per game. Central moved up to the 5A division this year and many in Monmouth were worried about the inaugural season at a higher level. Riddle and the Panthers apparently have chosen to go about the business of playing football and just face whoever the schedule makers put in front of them. At 3 and 1 the Panthers are well coached and have some talent and speed. Congrats to Coach Hedrick’s team for their appearance at number 8 in the 5A rankings just released Monday. Central lost a good game to number 3 Mountain View and will face top ranked Silverton later in the season.
MLB
The Seattle Mariners should be tough in 2015. The turnaround this year justifies the Robinson Cano deal and should help convince those who matter that King Felix is deserving of the Cy Young.
If the Dodgers get by St. Louis the sky is the limit. To this end Dodgers’ ace, and Cy Young no-brainer, Clayton Kershaw threw a simulated game earlier in the week to assure the red birds get a full dose of the lefty over the series.
For us left coasters wouldn’t an all-west side World Series just be delicious. Yeah it would… the networks would cringe …
If your soul needs a palate cleanser go YouTube the Bugs Bunny baseball episode; it’s pure and innocent and just plain Technicolor happiness. Try it with the kids … and then just you and their grandparents. Remember them? I do.
Well as the pig said “t-t-t-that’s all folks” until next week,
Out of context, apples to oranges and just a bit reactionary.
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