Game Rewind: Royals Flushed – Angels 9, Royals 6

I’ll be honest, last night’s game was incredibly exciting thanks to yet another Halo late-inning comeback, but it could have been a lot more fun had the opponent not been so utterly pathetic.  The Royals are in such disarray right now that I don’t see how anyone could possibly derive much enjoyment from beating them.  Bragging about sweeping Kansas City is the baseball equivalent to boasting about beating up a drunk, retarded dwarf.

Last night’s win should certainly be a credit to the resilient Angel hitters, but just as much credit should go to the Kansas City bullpen which hasn’t been able to protect a late lead since Truman was in office.  On paper their relievers look strong, but in practice they make the Angels’ Bullpen of Doom look like a six-pack of Mariano Riveras.

The bottom line is that Kansas City is basically a Triple-A team right now and they would have fired their manager weeks ago if he didn’t have such a badass mustache.  For the Halos, a win is still a win and they should be happy but let’s not start planning victory parades down Katella Avenue just yet.

Good News:

• My predictive powers know no bounds as I correctly nailed Chone Figgins collecting four hits in the game.  How the hell he got on board four times and scored no runs even though the man hitting behind him, Maicer Izturis had four RBIs.
• Howie Kendrick is slowly coming around, his solo homer in the seventh inning was an absolute bomb and Kendrick continues to hit the ball authority in general.  Some people think that his temporary demotion to Triple-A is what got him going again, personally I think it was the pulling of his Howard’s Electronics ads.
• Perhaps my calls to release Justin Speier are not falling on deaf ears.  Since I first demanded his head on a stick Speier has gone on to bail out an Angels starter two games in a row and was rewarded with a win last night.

Bad News:

• My only real complaint about Bobby Abreu is that sometimes he seems to forget that his job is to drive in runs, especially when hitting third in the order.  Striking out looking with two runners in scoring position in the late innings with your team trailing by two is simply unacceptable.  I know he has one of the best eyes in baseball, but there is such a thing as being too patient.  Swing the bat, Bobby.
• Joe Saunders was better tonight, only walking two and just one extra-base hit, but he still allowed six runs.  What killed him last night was that he just can’t close out batters, especially with runners in scoring position.  Saunders is just plain skittish when he is in a position to allow runs.  You cannot win when you pitch scared.

Halo Hero:

• Chone Figgins

While Figgy couldn’t translate his four hits into scoring any runs himself, his final hit knocked in the go-ahead runs off of closer extraordinair Joakim Soria.