(Warning: Really, really, really, really long post)
14 years have passed since EA Sports released what is arguably the greatest hockey video game in history, NHL 94. The pixelated “graphics.” The organ music. That damn thing had it all. And it had us all addicted to it.
Today I decided it was time to make us all feel really old. There are still players in the league who were privileged enough to be a part of this hockey video game classic, but their numbers are dwindling. They’re not exactly WW2 vets, but they are becoming increasingly rare nonetheless. Even the teams are vastly different. Three teams are now in different places and four were yet to be brought into existence (ah, the joys of a 26 team league).
So who are the last survivors? Who has managed to forge an additional 14 years onto their NHL career following the monumental success of pixelated hockey? The following is a list of 43 players who are still active in the NHL and a couple that are playing in Europe.
To qualify for this list, players needed to have played at least one game this past season in the NHL or another major league and did not announced their retirement (that means you, Glen Wesley). Mad props must go out to the folks at NHL94.com, whom I borrowed the above graphic from and used their rosters to make this list. It’s a bustling community of NHL 94 action, so be sure to check it out.
Anaheim Mighty Ducks
(Once upon a time they were Mighty.)
Sean Hill
Long believed to be a robot, Sean Hill is the only remaining member of the NHL 94 Anaheim Mighty Ducks. His robotic qualities did not necessarily equate to video game brilliance. EA graced him with the honor of a 44 for his overall attribute. And yes, that is out of 100. Long lost teammates such as: Lonnie Loach, Guy Hebert, Dennis Vial and Troy Long, who started on the wing in the game with a whopping rank of 49.
Boston Bruins
No known survivors.
Teammates included, but were not limited to: Adam Oates, Andy Moog and Boston’s Favorite Son, Cam Neely.
Buffalo Sabres
No known survivors.
With the retirement of Dominik Hasek last month, the last remaining member of the NHL 94 Sabres hung up his real life skates. Teammates included: Alexander “the Great” Mogilny, Pat LaFontaine (pre-concussion Pat), Grant Fuhr and Rob Ray.
Calgary Flames
Gary Roberts
What can I possibly hope to say about Gary Roberts that you do not already know? The man needs no introduction. He continues to fight on, despite being the only remaining member of the NHL 94 Calgary Flames. WWVGGRD? = What Would Video Game Gary Roberts Do? He would destroy your SEGA Genesis with his slapshot. Teammates included: Theo “Crackhead” Fleury, Mike Vernon, the Immortal Al MacInnis and Robert Reichel.
Chicago Blackhawks
Chris Chelios
Eddie “the Eagle” Belfour
Jeremy Roenick
These three were all video game legends. The ’94 Hawks may have been the most legit video game hockey team of the century. They even played in the old Chicago Stadium, which is absolutely ballin. Roenick up front, Chelly and Eddie in the back. What more do you need? Chelios, as I’m sure you’re aware, is striving to play forever. Belfour is playing in Sweden for Leksands IF because he believes he’s still 1994 Eddie and can dominate the NHL. The NHL begs to differ. JR, well, you know what his deal is. He also needs no introduction. Teammates included: Brian Noonan (Noonan!), Bryan Marchment, Jocelyn Lemieux and Joe Murphy.
Dallas Stars
Mike Modano
Is all that is man.
Derian Hatcher
Is doing whatever it is he does for Philadelphia.
Richard Matvichuk
Currently playing in the New Jersey Devils’ farm system.
Teammates included: Russ Courtnall, Mark Tinordi, Ulf Dahlen and the one and only, Enrico Ciccone.
Detroit Red Wings
Sergei Fedorov
Remember Sergei in 1994? He was freaking cool. Now, he’s still cool. Just a bit older. He’s also a free agent. Maybe you can sign him to your beer league team.
Mike Sillinger
Currently lost somewhere on Long Island.
Dallas Drake
His career is currently on a respirator with the Red Wings. They don’t have the heart to pull the plug. His name is still the most country name you could possibly have, unless you decide to name your kid “Texarkana.”
Teammates included: Bob Probert, Tim Chevelade, Paul Ysebaert and Steve Yzerman.
Edmonton Oilers
Doug Weight
Signed with the Islanders last week, will hopefully help bring the kids along. The Islanders will likely not have him pose like this anytime soon.
Martin Gelinas
Currently a free agent. Spent last season with Nashville.
Luke Richardson
Is also a free agent, may do birthday parties. Spent last year in Ottawa for 76 games and is still living in relative NHL anonymity.
Teammates Included: Zdeno Ciger, Kevin Todd, Bill Ranford, Ron Tugnutt.
Florida Panthers
No known survivors.
Scott Mellanby managed to play for both the Oilers and Panthers in this game. Now that is some serious commitment to the game of hockey. The Panthers only had nine forwards on the roster in the game, Mellanby was likely double shifted. Team included: John Vanbiesbrouck (never thought he would actually retire), some other guys.
Hartford Whalers
Mikael Nylander
Probably the most productive NHL 94 hockey player remaining (so far). Had 37 points in 40 games last year in Washington and is averaging just about a point per game since the lockout.
Robert Petrovicky
Currently playing in Sweden with Eddie Belfour.
Teammates included: Pat Verbeek, Zarley Zalapski, Sean Burke, Doug Houda.
Los Angeles Kings
Rob Blake
Teams up with JR as he signed a one-year deal with the Sharks last week.
Alexei Zhitnik
Released by the Thrashers last month. That’s about as low as you can get. His career might be kaput.
Darryl Sydor
Just finished up a trip to the Finals with the Penguins. TSN lists his current status as “off season.”
Teammates included: The Great One, Kelly Hrudey, Jari Kurri and Cammi Granato’s brother.
Montreal Canadiens
Patrice Brisebois
Is back in Montreal where he is shown much love.
Mathieu Schneider
Played the last two seasons in Anaheim and is currently searching for a job.
Teammates included: Rob Ramage, Patrick Roy, Guy Carbonneau, Denis Savard.
New Jersey Devils
Scott Niedermayer
Won a Stanley Cup with the Ducks and brother Rob last year. Kept no one up at night except himself by taking half the season to contemplate retirement.
Bobby Holik
How he is still getting paid to play NHL hockey is beyond me.
Bill Guerin
The third Islander in our countdown for those of you keeping score. If this was 1994, the Islanders would have a solid trio on their top line.
Teammates included: Ken Daneyko, Scott Stevens, Your Mom.
New York Islanders
Darius Kasparitis
Best known for having a last name that sounds like a disease and having no regard for human life while on the ice. Played last season back home in Russia. Was a part of one of my worst childhood memories when the Islanders traded him away for Bryan Smolinski. BRYAN FREAKING SMOLINSKI!!!
New York Rangers
Alexei Kovalev
Sergei Zubov
Remember this team? This team was freaking stacked. No wonder they won the cup. Kovalev, Zubov, Leetch and some other schmucks.
Ottawa Senators
No known survivors.
This was one crappy expansion team in the video game and real life. Their highest rated player? Norm MacIver who was a 61. Daniel Berthiaume was a solid 43 in net. Team included: Sylvain Turgeon, Brad Shaw and a bunch of scrubs.
Philadelphia Flyers
Mark Recchi
Released two days after his bobblehead night in Pittsburgh last December. Played out the season in Atlanta.
This team had Tommy Soderstrom. Remember that guy?
Pittsburgh Penguins
Jaromir Jagr
I don’t think I need to remind you about his summer saga. His NHL 94 hair can only be described as Mulletlicious. Teammates Included: Remnants of the Championship teams.
Quebec Nordiques
Joe Sakic
Moved with the team to Colorado and spent his whole career there.
Mats Sundin
Acts like a slut when it comes to picking a team for next year. He’s flirting with all interested parties and putting out all over the place.
Owen Nolan
Signed with the Minnesota Wild a few days ago. A solid contributor in Calgary the last few years.
Chris Simon
Recently moved into Suspension City. Owns a 4BR condo on the west side and was unanimously elected mayor by the townsfolk.
Adam Foote
See: Joe Sakic (plus a few years in Columbus).
By the way, how do you break up the trio of Nolan, Sakic and Sundin? That is an epic trio, looking back on it.
San Jose Sharks
Sandis Ozolinsh
Played 38 games in San Jose last year, currently looking for work. Teammates included: Pat Faloon (now that’s a blast from the past), Arturs Irbe, more expansion scrubs.
St. Louis Blues
Brendan Shanahan
Still going strong. Put up 23-23-46 in 73 games on Broadway last year.
Curtis Joseph
Came out of hiding to sign a one-year deal with the Maple Leafs last week. Is way, way, way past his prime. Wore a really cool mask in St. Louis.
Bret Hedican
Married Kristi Yamaguchi. Not sure if that’s how you spell her name, but a solid acquistion nonetheless. I’m talking about marrying her, of course.
Tampa Bay Lightning
Roman Hamrlik
First ever draft pick in Lightning history. Didn’t work out all that well. Still playing well, though. Teammates included: More expansion weak sauce.
Toronto Maple Leafs
No known survivors.
Speaking of weak sauce, how about the goaltending bust of one Felix “the Cat” Potvin? This was a pretty weak team, despite having a couple big names on the roster (see: Andreychuk, Gilmour, Clark, Ellett). Team included: Just named a whole bunch. You can look the rest up yourself.
Vancouver Canucks
Petr Nedved
Now playing in the Czech Republic. Scored nine goals in the post-lockout NHL.
Washington Captials
No known survivors.
Dale Hunter is a dick. Next.
Winnipeg Jets
Teemu Selanne
Absolutely sick in the post-lockout NHL. 96 points in 06-07 were the most he had put up in nearly a decade but that still doesn’t hold a candle to his rookie season of 1992-93. He scored 76 goals and 132 points, both rookie records that still stand today. He is still the last player to net 70 in a single season. Being rated a 90 in this game seems way too low.
Keith Tkachuk
Gesundheit.
Teppo Numminen
Had heart surgery in September and was able to return for the Sabres final game of the season. What a trooper.
BallHype – Honoring the NHL 94 Survivors
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