Forgive me for being young and stupid, or acting like it’s amateur hour, but I have a few observations on the Alex Rodriguez press conference. So let me get out some Tic Tacs and start squawking:
- When A-Rod said at the beginning of the presser that he was a little nervous, he did that whole puffing up his cheeks and pursing his lips thing he does during stressful at-bats.
- And when Alex read – or should I say droned – his written statement, I was thinking of Cheech and Chong’s “Sister Mary Elephant” comedy routine, when Chong reads his summer vacation report in a monotone. Come to think of it, maybe Alex should have read something about what he did on his summer vacation instead.
- I knew all about the mystery cousin thing before viewing the press conference (Is it Cousin Itt? Cousin Vinny? Who knows?), so I busted out laughing hearing A-Rod explain it. This is what the best and brightest PR team came up with as his defense? Sheesh.
- And this is the thing I can never get past regarding steroid usage – the whole needle thing. I have rolling veins, so every time I get blood drawn, it’s torture. And I don’t really like needles anyway. So I just can’t understand how ballplayers could let some buddy or trainer or “cousin” stick a needle in them. Bad things happen when you let somebody shoot you up. Didn’t he see “Trainspotting”?
- What was up with the very long pause when A-Rod started talking about his teammates? Was he overcome with emotion or calculated? It was very strange.
- And it was also odd that he recommended that if he had a son, he would recommend that he go to college. Alex has two daughters. Does he not think they should go to school beyond high school?
- The whole “I didn’t go to college” excuse doesn’t really fly, either. Nor does the young and stupid one. Roger Clemens went to college (my alma mater, incidentally) plus he was accused of juicing up in his 40s.
- My brother pointed out that A-Rod had his “cousin” smuggling drugs from the Dominican Republic for him. So didn’t he put his family member in legal jeopardy?
- Wonder what GNC thinks of Alex keeping on bringing them up as selling steroid-type products?
- The thing that rang the most true to me, where Alex sounded the most sincere, was when he said that the effects of performance-enhancing drugs were half-physical, and half-mental.
- Other than that, this press conference was pretty much a disaster. But, as A-Rod said, he laid his bed, and now he’s going to have to sit on it!
What do you think? And which cousin helped A-Rod? Leave us a comment!
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