Jack Edwards Surprisingly Calm After 3 SH Goals in 80 seconds

What the hell, Jack? I thought you were crazy. I thought you were unhinged, spontaneous and the anti-Joe Buck. For the love of Tkachuk, you were the guy who got all excited and once compared a Bruins victory to a Revolutionary War battle. You didn’t just compare sports to war. You compared a regular season game to colonial warfare. Who does that? I mean, really.

So that’s why, Jack, when you lost your shit — or should I say got mildly excited — when the Bruins scored 3 shorthanded goals on the same penalty kill I was disappointed. Sure, you got all excited, but you didn’t even try and one up the Revolutionary War reference. Maybe if you had compared this triumph to storming the beaches of Normandy or Rocky defeating Mr. T in Rocky III it would be OK. But no, Mr. Edwards. I am disappointed with your level of excitement. You had the good luck to call something that no NHL announcer before you has ever been able to call. And you didn’t make a spectacular Jack Edwards Call. It’s OK. Really, it is. Just next time, remember what you’re here for — to go absolutely bat shit and say crazy things.