Kickin’ It With the Bills: Entry One

Dear Bills,

Hey, how are you guys doing? I decided I was going to take a crack at watching you boys this season to try and get into more sports. Hockey is great and all but unfortunately, that’s not all year round and I figured since you are my hometown team, I should probably give you guys the proper chance – even though you haven’t been good since my existence. I mean, I’m sure you will eventually get better…I just need some time to understand the rules and learn all off your names. After Lee Evans was traded to Baltimore a couple of days ago, I only know a very few of you. I know this is only the preseason and a lot of you are going to be gone. So for now I say ‘so long’ and sorry I never got the chance to learn your name. If you’re lucky enough to make the cut someday, perhaps I shall.

Now onto the real business. I luckily got out of work at around nine last night just in time to hear some of the game before the half. I was twisting the radio dial feverishly to find the station – on AM radio. I think I’m so used to 550 being the station for the Sabres that I automatically went to that, completely forgetting that your games are usually broadcasted on 97 Rock. My bad. Anyways, can’t say I was surprised to hear you were down in the game. I think a whole 3 minutes in time passed in the football game by the time I left work and got home, which is about a seven minute drive for me. If I had ADHD, I definitely would not be able to watch football. Ever. Too much time inbetween plays and I couldn’t keep still.

The first thing I saw when I turned on the TV was your new uniforms. I think they’re snazzy. To be honest, I prefer the look of the helmet over the actually jersey but that’s me. This is probably because I don’t think I’ll purchase a Bills jersey in the near future (we won’t speak of the Edwards jersey debacle that I had a year ago. It was $20 and he sat the day after I bought it.) If this works out between the two of us, I’ll think about doing it. I don’t even have a favorite Bill yet. I’ll save that for the regular season. Half of you boys will be gone by that time anyways.

So that intermission game film that was shown during halftime…what gives with the quality? If it was last year, I would’ve expected the highlights to be a bit crisper or something. This is the year 2011. I was kind of disappointed, I mean, I already don’t know what’s going on but that made it even worse. It was a highlight of the 2010 season! Moments like that should always be in HD. I don’t think Bills fans get enough of it during a season. Also, does that ‘Back To Football’ commercial bother anyone else that Lee Evans is still shown quite a bit in it? From what I gathered, some people weren’t too upset about him being traded (probably for what we got in return though) and I think they had time to edit that commercial. Editing fail. Get me in on that job, please.

Maybe I could tell you about some of my insight on the game itself? Watching the Bills defend is painful. I watch what the other team does normally when the Bills have the ball and they don’t flub as much as we tend to. Players are falling all over the place, not defending their man, the team just looks like a wreck on the field for the most part. Again, preseason is the time to get the kinks out so I’m not going to crucify you for your first preseason game. It’s just that you lost 10-3. You defended but not well enough and you couldn’t get the ball down the field enough. Sounds like the same old, same old with you boys so far this year. The fact is I heard you were leading in this game too. Oy vey.

Now I pose some questions to the general public that I came up with during the game:First one is a stupid question! On some plays, why does the clock continue to run down? I never understood them stopping the clock sometimes and then other times, it’ll keep going. What determines a ‘stoppage in play’?Secondly, another stupid question: When they interviewed Stevie Johnson, he had a humongous diamond earring in and a stud sticking out of his cheekbone. I would think in football that would be highly dangerous to wear in case you were hit. The earring perhaps not but whatever that piercing was in his cheek, that thing could go right into the bone. It hurts me just thinking about it. Are football players allowed to ear jewelry during game play? I’m sure it’s an ‘at your own risk’ type a thing and anyone else could really give a hoot about it.

Anyways, this first game was fun. I don’t know if I will be able to watch you next week for I will be in work once again for a full amount of time. Hopefully the next game will prove to be better than this one. Good luck.

Follow Shelby on Twitter: @shelbygriswold.