Dr. Mantis Toboggan will be joining us every week to answer questions submitted by you, the readers! In the future, you can send any questions, about anything at all, to [email protected] .
Kyla (Harpor Woods): Do you think the Red Wings will make the playoffs this year?
Dr. Mantis Toboggan: When I first read this question, I thought it was a joke. The last time the Red Wings didn’t make the playoffs, The Simpsons aired for the first time, you could buy gas for a buck and a quarter, and astronomy was revolutionized with the hubble telescope being placed in orbit. Damn, now that I think about it, a lot of good shit happens when they don’t make the playoffs, so I wouldn’t mind if they didn’t. BUT I think they’ll sneak in like the socks guy in Mr. Deeds.
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Travis (Long Island): How do you feel about Justin Verlander’s extension?
Dr. Mantis Toboggan: How do you feel once you’ve waited six hours to use the bathroom after a long night of drinking and had a meal of string cheese sticks? Yeah, it feels REFRESHINGLY AWESOME.
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Kevin (Windsor): What the fuck is up with the Pistons?
Dr. Mantis Toboggan: What the fuck is up with the Pistons is right. No really, what? I haven’t been watching that much. Didn’t they get moved to Tulsa?
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Corey (Norwalk): Why aren’t you at all the Super Bowl festivities in Miami?
Dr. Mantis Toboggan: I was invited to go to a couple parties, but Sharpie and Kleenex sponsored parties didn’t appeal to me. I assumed that the most famous people at those parties would have been the Savage brothers anyway. I have no problem sitting at home, trippin’ balls on acid, and watching the Super Bowl from my couch. Thanks.
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Trista (Midland): What’s your favorite TV show?
Dr. Mantis Toboggan: Anything I can play drinking games to. Drink every time you see Neil Patrick Harris. Drink every time Snooki gets punched or you want to punch her. Stuff like that.
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Stu (Hollywood): I have a really disgusting rash on my bum, what do you suggest I do?
Dr. Mantis Toboggan: Move to Cleveland.
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Cal (in fornia): My fiance watches this show called “Snapped,” which is about all these wives that lose their shit and wind up murdering their husbands. Should I be worried?
Dr. Mantis Toboggan: Woo boy. I’d be very, very worried if she watches while sharpening the kitchen knife, or lets out a sadistic giggle every time the husband is murdered. Other than that, I’d say it’s totally fucked up, but you should be safe.
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