NLCS Game 7: Beat. Beaten. Battered.

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Wasn't that fun? 

It was the last game in the National League for 2012. From April 4th to October 22nd, its members played games to decide a champion. And with the brightest spotlight being shone, the Cardinals wilted.
 
In order, the Top 5 Most Awful Things About Game 7:
 
5) Allen Craig. 
 
Dude came up WAY limp in the post-season. He gave us some serious soft-serve. Guy was 6th in NL batting average, 5th in NL slugging and 9th in NL OPS during the regular season.
 
Against the Giants he only came up with 1 extra-base hit, left a small village on-base (even with his vaunted BA w/RISP) and barely cracked a .100 BA with a few dinks and dunks the past couple of games.
 
4) Peter Kozma.
 
In his defense, it is hard to play defense with wet underwear. Right?
 
The best Tweet I saw (forgive not being to find attribution): "RIP Kozmania. 2012-2012". If this wasn't his first real taste of the bigs, we'd have him at #1, since he played some absolute dog grade defense. But he'll learn from this. The Cardinals have a way of making sure playoff meltdowns don't turn into bigger problems the next season.
 
Right, Rick?
 
RIGHT?
 
3) Matt Carpenter. 
 
Not that there is any pressure in a NLCS Game 7 right? I'm sure that Matt Cain was just chomping at the bit to face a guy who's tagged him for 5 hits in his first 5 tries, including 2 HRs. Pfffft… no worries.
 
What? What's that? Oh, Carpenter didn't play. Of course you wouldn't want him in there before mop up time. Because that wouldn't be nice.
 
2) Kyle Lohse.
 
If you needed one last reminder of how we viewed that contract a couple of seasons ago, Kyle Lohse has a little parting gift for you. He'd like to have brought it over to your house and set it on your front porch before lighting it on fire, but he's in California.
 
You think he even comes back to STL to get his stuff?
 
Or just heads straight to Boras' man cave and forgets any of this even happened? A little MMQB of me after the fact, but did anyone else think he looked tired? Like he slept about none last night?
 
1) Donovan Osborne.
 
Maybe he can give Kozma a call or something later this week. I'm pretty sure that 16 years after that blown 3-1 series against Atlanta, I wouldn't be talking about the stinking DO.
 
Here we are, though, excising him from the history rankings as the the #1 post-season flop in my lifetime. 
 
Still, I had to hear about Donovan all day. You probably did too. And now, the Cardinals have beat by a million runs. Re-opening a childhood memory I've been trying to forget.
 
At least Brian McKnight remembered the words to God Bless America. We'll have to take solace in the little wins. 
 
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