Before I begin this little take factory I got a-cooking about Cam, his post game press conference and my lack of [redacted]’s to give about the sentimentality of some fans and media – a primer:
As always, I’m going to drive all over the neighborhood to make some points, but I wanna start with one – role modeling, parenting and athletes. Slogging through twitter after the Super Bowl is both fun and draining – not because of the wins and losses, per se, but because of the pearl clutching that comes out of when a (black) player is assertive in any way. T.O.’s celebrating touchdowns? – “My kids are watching.” Cam celebrates a first down and dabs? – “What is that saying to the youth.” Cam is less than enthusiastic about a post-game press conference? – “How do I reeach these keeeeeds?”
(If you don’t get that reference, here you go. You’re welcome.)
Cam Newton doesn’t raise my son. Nor does any athlete or TV star or movie star or politician or cereal. My wife and I do. And while we are not perfect, the last thing you’d ever hear out of me is an excuse that my kids are influenced by what any of those people do more than via their parents. Right now he’s 3, going on 4 and loves Paw Patrol, John Cena and Ninja Turtles. He can watch football with daddy and I don’t have to force feed some of the insane narratives #TwitterDad and #TwitterMom bring to the table.
“How am I going to explain that Cam was mad during a press conference”? I’ll do it by showing that sometimes in life you have bad things happen and we all react differently. If #TwitterParent wants, he or she can have a seat as I explain that raising your voice as a black man in the United States in 2016 gets you all sorts of trouble, whilst a Christie type can yell and rage all he wants to become a “go getter”.
YOU LIKE THAT? Or only when the voice or the face is an approved one?
Or, if you’re worried that Cam celebrating is bad sportsmanship and teaches your kids to have exuberance during a kids game gone corporate, by all means also comment on the J.J. Watt call out of the week, the Aaron Rodgers Double Check, Brady cursing a blue streak, Peyton not shaking hands after his loss vs New Orleans…I can find something for everyone. Heck, if you’re more dumbfounded by Cam, or Beyoncé’s half time show but won’t broach how there are cheerleading squads that were treated to sub-human rules and regs by NFL teams for the ogling and benefit of the male-dominated sport, I can get a friend to write a book for you on how to handle it. (P.S. – buy all of the @Gooseroost‘s books. ALL OF THEM)
Let’s throw some nuance on this parenting issue – I influence my son, but seeing a black quarterback or a black president or a black C.E.O. or a black brain surgeon will give him an opportunity to think “I can do that if I have the talent/ability to do so”. And if he doesn’t see someone who looks like him in his dream job, he will have his mother and I to push and support and challenge him to be the first – be that change he wants. And to be ready for the shade.
Nuance. That is what you use to say, “Cam reacted negatively, but given the situation I understand.”
It isn’t what you use as the springboard to say “I told you so” as we are wont to do in this “Embrace Debate” wonky world of life now. There is no room for grey – only right and wrong. I can say Cam didn’t handle the interviews well without putting value judgments on him. But for the life of me, some fans and media cannot. And that’s sad, man.
To the other side – the media and the complaints Cam could’ve handled himself better in the moment – the moment absorbs us all at times. In that unforgiving minute, some of us just react. When I coach – I focus on making as much as possible ‘the moment’ something our kids can learn from. But I won’t ever chastise a player for being themselves. I’m a ridiculously sore loser – always have been. My brothers and I had darn-near prison rules for pick up games at home, to the point my mom ended them sometime around like 14 or 15 years old. But after the game, we’re brothers and it’s all good. If you asked me, after a game at any level I’ve coached that we’ve lost in, I would not have good answers.
I’m also 34 and know the deal. One of my favorite scenes in a movie is this one from “Undercover Brother” – ‘angry black man in khakis’ is not the look as a coach of color, even though Pat Knight’s got the market cornered on tossed chairs and “fire” for the ages. For my players’ sake I’m glad we don’t have high schoolers being interviewed after that moment. Adults read too much already into other adults’ responses to inane questioning – I’d hate to hear the takes on little ones.
These are the questions that Cam was asked – and if anyone in that room said they’re the voice of the fan, put them in the Peter King uber shill island and leave em there:
I mean, it’s not like Cam was walking away from some great questions… pic.twitter.com/F6Quur7xvz
— Max Olson (@max_olson) February 8, 2016
//platform.twitter.com/widgets.jsNow, for the nuance. While answer these questions, Cam is also hearing, after the biggest loss of his career, this in the next room. Listen carefully:
THIS is why Cam walked out (listen to what’s being said in the background). pic.twitter.com/6LdLFwv8tj
— Brian (@bmweezy13) February 8, 2016
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And then the Celebrity wing of #TwitterDad was another case of nuance gone wrong:
Wow. What a press conference from Cam Newton. So gracious!So classy! So humble! What an example to kids! Just like Peyton. #dab #SuperBowl
— Rob Lowe (@RobLowe) February 8, 2016
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Rob – I enjoyed your roles on Parks and Rec as well as The Grinder, currently on Fox. But, a simple Google search of “Rob Lowe arrest” reminds me a man that got community service for a sex-tape with two women (one of which is a minor) might wanna cool it on the “example to kids” card. Just a thought.
Nuance.
This craziness will all start again with the combine and the draft. I challenge you – please do not use the same tired tropes and dog whistles for the players whose pigment will determine to you how much they are all about the team. Use a little nuance and figure out for yourself, outside of those constructs if you are more annoyed by a player that enjoys himself and can fall just as far as he flies.
Because if Cam Newton is more important to you than battered wives and girlfriends, CTE, a league that cannot legislate itself on the field as much as the Commissioner tries to off it and a cap structure that puts the pressure on players to “take the discount” over owners losing some profit, you probably stopped reading this a while ago.
And you’re the one that needed to read this the most.
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